Honestly, it’s so damned hard to understand. Granted, I’m somewhat biased, hailing from a “socialist” Nordic country, but I just can’t wrap my head around how these nauseating unique sales propositions are palatable to, let alone desired by, anyone.

We should take women’s rights away! cheering

We should make it easier for arms merchants to make more money by facilitating more efficient killing! heavy applause

People who love other people than those dictated to be loveable by either ancient superstitious nonsense or machismo-fueled ignorance are evil! the crowd goes wild

I will fight for your right to sell your organs if your personal situation becomes so abysmally dire that you have no other options (and I will make sure to facilitate the further ruination of the economy and funneling of money to the wealthy so that you’ll get there faster)! erections abound

I’ll make sure that healthcare becomes a luxury most can’t afford! pure rapture

With your precious votes, I’ll cut the funding to schools and make sure that by the time you realise what a hell-scape you’ve helped me create, your kids will be too dumb to get rid of me and my kind, and will rebel against you by perpetuating my abuse! every single person climaxes

Wait, that last one was actually from a speech my predecessors have been handing down for generations! nobody hears because they’re too stupid, passed out from excessive orgasming, or a combination of the two

…

Seriously, what is the appeal?? 😓