- Split myself down the middle and play with both cats 
- I sit in the hallway and say 'pss pss pss pss" while making a scratching motion with my hand. The cat that comes over first becomes King. 
- Make sure they can both see me and understand that I heard their cries. Turn my back and walk away. - Meet injustice with justice. 
- Shut both doors, then open a different one and say “Whose a lovely kitty then?”. 
- Shake the treat bag so they both come to me. 
- Sit in the hall in view of both. - Put the ball back into their court. The little hellions… 
- The splits 
- Sit where you are, invite them to come join you - Watch as they both ignore you. - Then at least it’s their own fault - Nothing is a cat’s fault - cats 
 
- Then you gotta play the game. Stand real still. Lick your arm. Scratch your head a little. Then spaz out and run away. 
 
- That’s what a cat would do 
 
- The same thing a cat would do. Look at them both, give a slow blink, then stand up and walk away to go do my own thing. - Check mate kitty 🙀♟️🎭 
- Power move. You sit down in the hallway and make them come to you. 
- Refuse to participate in this no-win scenario. - Instead? Ignore them and eat a can of tuna. - They will both come running to demand you drop some tuna for them - This is the ideal, yes. - If you can’t win a scenario, change the scenario. 
 
- Precisely. I came to comment simply: open a can of anything. Solved. - Sometimes you can even close one 
 
- Just make sure they don’t have access to where you sleep. 
 
- Sit in the hallway and go “Ps, ps, ps.” 
- Turn and walk away. Never negotiate with terrorists! - Mate I’m still laughing as I type this comment thank you so much 
 
- Walk into the kitchen, shake treat container. 
- There is this thing called “pspsps” did you know that? 













