If a non-abusive mother or father has cancer and is on their deathbed, and their son refuses to see them, is that cold, unforgivable, and ‘wrong’? Would it be wrong if the son or daughter celebrated their death?

  • FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca
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    2 days ago

    Yes it would be wrong. By what possible reasoning would it not be wrong? You made sure to tell us the parents are non-abusive, because otherwise people would say “yeah, it’s okay to be mean to your parents if they’re abusive”. You know people are going to tell you you…uh I mean the hypothetical offspring, is a fucking sociopath. Is that the answer you’re looking for? Yes, it’s wrong to be indifferent to your parents suffering and it’s wrong to be happy about their deaths, unless they did something to deserve it

    • DahGangalang@infosec.pub
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      1 day ago

      Hey friend, this is c/NoStupidQuestions.Ease up on the tone.

      I know I feel for OP’s take since I feel largely the same way about my Mom. I’m hesitant to enumerate my grievances against her, but I don’t think her actions really ever quite amounted to “abuse”.

      There’s been a lot of keeping secrets, lying, asking me to keep secrets and lie on her behalf, insisting I maintain relationships with legit bad people in the extended family, feeding the worst tendencies of people in the near family, and just being manipulative in general. And that’s before we talk about her probable (though never proven) cheating on my old man or her heavy marijuana use during mine and my siblings early childhood (older sis talks about her doing things that probably hit the level of abusive neglect while high for days at a time, but that was before I can remember).

      So yeah, now that I’m in my mid-late 30’s, I don’t really talk to her much. I don’t think I hit the level of “would enjoy her suffering”, but I don’t intend to go out of my way to see her again.

      I hope I’m the outlier in the sense of my story is rare, but I do see why others can not love their parents, even when they weren’t abusive in the strictest sense.

      • FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca
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        1 day ago

        I see you assume op is a normal person. There’s a history of posts on this and other accounts (some deleted) that indicate op is a sociopath. They have said repeatedly they care about nobody but themself and maybe a romantic partner. They find it unthinkable to care about anyone else in your family. They have said they’ll celebrate children dying because of how little They care about anyone. Even in the context of this post, they’re not only expressing indifference, they’re trying to get a reaction by saying at the end they’d be happy if their parents died, even when the parents clearly did nothing to them, they just don’t care about others. They said non-abusive to make sure we know the parents are innocent, they haven’t been mistreated or they’d say so in the post, they just don’t see why they should care about others. They’re baffled that it’s wrong not to care about people in your family. They’re baffled that it’s wrong to be indifferent towards people who aren’t your romantic partner