On a rare occasion I hit a website that loads just like “boom” and it surprises me.
Why is that? Because now we are used to having to wait for javascript to load, decompress, parse, JIT, transmogrify, rejimble and perform two rinse cycles just to see the opening times for the supermarket.
(And that’s after you dismissed the cookie, discount/offer and mailing list nags with obfuscated X buttons and all other manner of dark patterns to keep you engaged)
The widespread tendency for JavaScript developers to intercept built-in browser functionality and replace it with their own poor implementation, effectively breaking the user’s browser while on that site.
And then there’s the vastly increased privacy & security attack surface exposed by JavaScript.
It’s so bad that I am now very selective about which sites are allowed to run scripts. With few exceptions, a site that fails to work without JavaScript (and can’t be read in Firefox Reader View) gets quickly closed and forgotten.
My usual onlineshop got a redesign (sort of). Now, the site loads the header, then the account and cart icons blink a while and after a few seconds it loads the content.
having to wait for javascript to load, decompress, parse, JIT, transmogrify, rejimble and perform two rinse cycles
This is whole sentence is facetious nonsense. Just-in-time compilation is not in websites, it’s in browsers, and it was a massive performance gain for the web. Sending files gzipped over the wire has been going on forever and the decompressing on receival is nothing compared to the gains on load time. I’m going to ignore the made up words. If you don’t know you don’t know. Please don’t confidently make shit up.
EDIT: I’m with about the nags though. Fuck them nags.
Yep.
On a rare occasion I hit a website that loads just like “boom” and it surprises me.
Why is that? Because now we are used to having to wait for javascript to load, decompress, parse, JIT, transmogrify, rejimble and perform two rinse cycles just to see the opening times for the supermarket.
(And that’s after you dismissed the cookie, discount/offer and mailing list nags with obfuscated X buttons and all other manner of dark patterns to keep you engaged)
Sometimes I wish we’d just stopped at gopher :)
See also: https://motherfuckingwebsite.com/
EDIT: Yes, this is facetious.
Irony
Hahahahhah.
Another continual irritation:
The widespread tendency for JavaScript developers to intercept built-in browser functionality and replace it with their own poor implementation, effectively breaking the user’s browser while on that site.
And then there’s the vastly increased privacy & security attack surface exposed by JavaScript.
It’s so bad that I am now very selective about which sites are allowed to run scripts. With few exceptions, a site that fails to work without JavaScript (and can’t be read in Firefox Reader View) gets quickly closed and forgotten.
My usual onlineshop got a redesign (sort of). Now, the site loads the header, then the account and cart icons blink a while and after a few seconds it loads the content.
Ah yes, and the old “flash some faded out rectangles” to prepare you for that sweet, sweet, information that’s coming any… moment… now…
No, now…
Now…
Is “rejimble” a real word for a real thing?
Who’s the genius who named it that?
I made it up, but if be happy for it to be adopted.
No, but it could be if we try hard enough!
Having 2 loads gives the illusion that it’s fast, aka. not waiting staring at something not doing anything for too long.
From a business perspective, isn’t it best to just yeet most stuff to the front end to deal with?
This is whole sentence is facetious nonsense. Just-in-time compilation is not in websites, it’s in browsers, and it was a massive performance gain for the web. Sending files gzipped over the wire has been going on forever and the decompressing on receival is nothing compared to the gains on load time. I’m going to ignore the made up words. If you don’t know you don’t know. Please don’t confidently make shit up.
EDIT: I’m with about the nags though. Fuck them nags.
deleted by creator