There is essentially universal agreement in the field of child psychology that “beating” your child is the wrong approach.
I’ve yet to meet a parent that completely ignores their child in a public venue. In many cultures children are considered to be a part of society / community and so they are given some autonomy to discover the world with their peers. Hyper individualistic Western society is really the odd one out here and Western cultures are the only ones where I’ve seen this take expressed openly. Conclude from that what you will.
A few weeks ago my wife and I were getting breakfast at a local bakery. Inside, a dad had decided that it did not matter that his small child was running around, screaming at the top of his lungs. The little gremlin started trying to steal pastries off other people’s tables and dad stiff didn’t do anything until the staff announced loudly that all unattended children would be reported to CPS.
That kid didn’t need a beating, but that dad sure did.
Look, with parents you never know what they just went through. Maybe they didn’t get any sleep or whatever. A different approach would have been for someone to start playing with the kid
Although I agree with the sentiment, I would NEVER expect anybody to entertain my kids. I would just pack them up and gone home. My kids are my burden to bear.
If you’re a parent, you are the problem. It’s not strangers’ jobs to parent your kids. If you can’t keep them from bothering other people do not take them to places with other people. It’s not socially acceptable for me to kick your kid, so don’t put me in a position where that starts seeming like a good idea.
If you can’t keep them from bothering other people do not take them to places with other people.
Kids will always bother those around them. They cry, they can’t understand or follow social cues etc. But they’re people and imo they have the right to exist in public places.
In Berlin neighbors sue schools all the time for noise pollution, for being too noisy. Like wtf
That does happen in other more child friendly cultures. Its just not a priority in Western culture. Children are very much seen as an impediment to productivity rather than an investment in the future. Its a consequence of capitalistic and individualistic ideals, for better or for worse.
I personally resonate with the song Eat Your Young by Hozier. It’s an indictment on all modern culture but I feel Western culture especially. The overall message being that (in my interpretation) when we focus on productivity instead of sustainability we sell out future generations.
That’s not how that works. Also people never had time to parent. They probably have more time now. Older generations were just sent out on the streets to play in the morning or after school and had to be back for dinner.
That’s fucked. How many square meters of living space do you 4 have? You’re in the US I assume? Since basically everywhere else you would be better off
oof my condolences. Idk I’ve never been there maybe serbia is nice. Germany is okay money wise to live in, but it’s a country governed by the old and shady. So nothing much good happens here, also the nazis are gaining more and more support.
I think many use “beating” as a hyperbole, just like if I said my mom would kill me if I did that. I don’t mean she would literally kill me.
Before I go on, could you be more specific on what “western culture” and which “hyper individualistic western society” you are talking about?
Now I’ve traveled quite a bit all over the world. I’ve seen parents of all cultures just straight up ignoring their child’s awful behavior.
And maybe it’s just me seeing these specific tourists the most. The Chineese parents are the biggest offender that I’ve seen in my travels. Their children do whatever they want and they don’t say anything. Just an example from the top of my head, climbing on shelves in a grocery store while the parents just watched.
There is essentially universal agreement in the field of child psychology that “beating” your child is the wrong approach.
I’ve yet to meet a parent that completely ignores their child in a public venue. In many cultures children are considered to be a part of society / community and so they are given some autonomy to discover the world with their peers. Hyper individualistic Western society is really the odd one out here and Western cultures are the only ones where I’ve seen this take expressed openly. Conclude from that what you will.
A few weeks ago my wife and I were getting breakfast at a local bakery. Inside, a dad had decided that it did not matter that his small child was running around, screaming at the top of his lungs. The little gremlin started trying to steal pastries off other people’s tables and dad stiff didn’t do anything until the staff announced loudly that all unattended children would be reported to CPS.
That kid didn’t need a beating, but that dad sure did.
Agreed, that’s unacceptable.
Look, with parents you never know what they just went through. Maybe they didn’t get any sleep or whatever. A different approach would have been for someone to start playing with the kid
Although I agree with the sentiment, I would NEVER expect anybody to entertain my kids. I would just pack them up and gone home. My kids are my burden to bear.
I wouldn’t either but I’m not in this persons shoes
If you’re a parent, you are the problem. It’s not strangers’ jobs to parent your kids. If you can’t keep them from bothering other people do not take them to places with other people. It’s not socially acceptable for me to kick your kid, so don’t put me in a position where that starts seeming like a good idea.
Kids will always bother those around them. They cry, they can’t understand or follow social cues etc. But they’re people and imo they have the right to exist in public places.
In Berlin neighbors sue schools all the time for noise pollution, for being too noisy. Like wtf
Kids keeping parents from sleeping —> no bakery trip or 1 parent goes/1 parent keeps the kids at home. That‘s the appropriate response to that.
That does happen in other more child friendly cultures. Its just not a priority in Western culture. Children are very much seen as an impediment to productivity rather than an investment in the future. Its a consequence of capitalistic and individualistic ideals, for better or for worse.
I personally resonate with the song Eat Your Young by Hozier. It’s an indictment on all modern culture but I feel Western culture especially. The overall message being that (in my interpretation) when we focus on productivity instead of sustainability we sell out future generations.
Very simple: Don’t have children, and the population will collapse until people have time to parent again.
That’s not how that works. Also people never had time to parent. They probably have more time now. Older generations were just sent out on the streets to play in the morning or after school and had to be back for dinner.
Both my parents and me are working, we still can’t get a net positive out in a month. My brother is basically neglected
That’s fucked. How many square meters of living space do you 4 have? You’re in the US I assume? Since basically everywhere else you would be better off
Serbia actually. Please nuke us, we have oil.
oof my condolences. Idk I’ve never been there maybe serbia is nice. Germany is okay money wise to live in, but it’s a country governed by the old and shady. So nothing much good happens here, also the nazis are gaining more and more support.
I have many times seen parents ignoring their child’s behaviour in public, pretty much every time I go shopping.
That’s incredible, there may be some regional variation at play here.
I think many use “beating” as a hyperbole, just like if I said my mom would kill me if I did that. I don’t mean she would literally kill me.
Before I go on, could you be more specific on what “western culture” and which “hyper individualistic western society” you are talking about?
Now I’ve traveled quite a bit all over the world. I’ve seen parents of all cultures just straight up ignoring their child’s awful behavior.
And maybe it’s just me seeing these specific tourists the most. The Chineese parents are the biggest offender that I’ve seen in my travels. Their children do whatever they want and they don’t say anything. Just an example from the top of my head, climbing on shelves in a grocery store while the parents just watched.