Hey guys, I recently started to play with the thought to deploy a Snikket (XMPP) server on my VPS to play around with it a bit. I already had a Matrix (Continuwuity) server running on an older VPS with Docker at one point. But besides me using some bridges (WhatsApp, Signal etc.) it didn’t see a lot of use. Originally I had set it up with the goal to replace Discord, but so far couldn’t get my small group of gamer friends to switch to something else.

What are your experiences with XMPP (doesn’t have to be Snikket) or Matrix? Would you recommend one over the other maintenance and/or usability wise?

Just curious what the community’s current sentiment is in regards to private self hosted messaging services 😊

  • OrangeSlice@lemmy.ml
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    7 hours ago

    Nobody has mentioned mattermost yet. I haven’t stress tested it by any means, but I found it too be decent.

  • pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip
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    22 hours ago

    To me, XMPP is still the instant messaging gold standard. Everything has an app (or seventeen apps) supporting it, and it tends to just work.

    My experiences with XMPP are: very good.

    Matrix does more. I have used it on and off for fancier online meet-up type stuff. As others have said, it is relatively new, and that has various costs and drawbacks.

  • artyom@piefed.social
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    24 hours ago

    I haven’t use XMPP much. Matrix is kind of a nightmare. It has most of the important things of a chat platform but as others have said, is a pain in the butt to use. Encryption issues, slow loading, images not loading, etc. It’s also basically on-par with something like WhatsApp, security-wise, in that your message content is encrypted but pretty much nothing else is, and when 90%+ of users are in the matrix.org domain anyway, that’s not acceptable, in my opinion.

    I would recommend SimpleX instead.

  • Jade@programming.dev
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    1 day ago

    A lot of the people reporting issues with Matrix being slow and resource heavy are reporting issues with Synapse, which is Element’s big Python implementation. My Continuwuity instance, which is a server written in Rust, uses a fraction of a CPU and a total storage in the hundreds of megabytes. A few less features, but it has most of the ones people care about.

    • Eldaroth@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 day ago

      Can’t speak for the Synapse hosting, as back when I hosted one myself I directly started with Dendrite (was not really that feature rich) and switched to Continuiwity soon after. And I have to agree, ran like a charm on my VPS and didn’t use a ton of resources. Granted, I was the only user so can’t say how the usage would have increased with more users active.

  • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 day ago

    Personally I like XMPP over Matrix because

    • Matrix clients aren’t great (even element is buggy as piss on my phone and a shitty electron app on linux)
    • Matrix is too difficult for “normal” people (I agree they should get good but they don’t and what good is a chat app without recipients).
    • Matrix public rooms have a CP problem, and as such I can’t recommend people join it just in case, I don’t need my mom seeing that shit.
    • Matrix was started as an Amdocs project before they defunded it and the lead dev went to form The Matrix Foundation. Amdocs is a Mossad affiliated company that infiltrated American telcom companies long ago. Matrix also pisses metadata to any server it federates with, including matrix [.] org, and I have no proof that Mossad is spying on that metadata but I have no trust either, nor proof that they aren’t, so I can’t trust matrix anymore.

    Though XMPP also has had it’s own problems for me, so at the moment it’s my fallback and I’m trying out Delta Chat which I have been loving.

    • Eldaroth@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 day ago

      Couldn’t agree more with the first two points, especially the second one when it comes to adaptability by my non-techy friends and especially the wife-approval-factor.

      I only tried out Delta Chat like two years ago linking it to a secondary Gmail account. Don’t think this really fully utilized it to its full potential. What do you like most so far about Delta Chat?

      • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 day ago

        They no longer recommend using a traditional email account, instead recommending chatmail servers like these (there’s more as well, but they have this small list to choose from in the app or you can bring your own). They say if you have to use traditional email use a dedicated account for delta chat, not one that also gets traditional email.

        I like how they are trying to address metadata as much as possible, the onboarding is so easy my literal mother can do it, video/audio calling is in beta and works pretty well (some glitches, but it’s in beta), the webXDC stuff is cool but I don’t really use it yet, and I’m sure I’m forgetting something.

  • lambalicious@lemmy.sdf.org
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    22 hours ago

    XMPP is the best among the listed options, although ??? is not that far behind (or wouldn’t be, I still can’t find a mobile app, does anyone know one???). Good servers include Snikket, ejabberd and Prosody. It’s also the best fit for a small and/or private installation because it’s quite light (not lightweight like IRC, but still light), whereas Matrix is a nu-protocol and this quite hefty on resources, and honestly I have never seen benchmarks on what running a ??? service is like, not even for the official Docker container.

  • stratself@lemdro.id
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    1 day ago

    I’m running continuwuity, and ejabberd as text-only IM servers to talk to some communities. The latter (and XMPP in general) has more moving parts (more ports, SRV records, etc) to set up, but messages deliver much faster and take much less resources. They’d probably both run fine on a VPS with the proper tweaks anyhow - the Rust-based server makes Matrix actually not suck after all

    For bridges, I’ve used maunium-discord as a Matrix bridge in the past, and trying out slidcord right now. I think Matrix bridges still got better UI/UX due to more supported features (spaces/threads) and coherent clients, though let it be known Slidge is a hobbyist project. If your chat server is mainly for bridges, stick to Matrix and consider disabling federation. Also Matrix if you’d like your friends to switch over from Discord - it has more Discordesque features like custom emojis/stickers and SFU-backed group calls

    Though this doesn’t mean I’m unrecommending XMPP. I do appreciate its clients’ snappiness, in-band notifications, the general ephemerality of its chats, and unrivaled efficiency. I kinda wanna write a blogpost comparing both software and protocols, but right now I don’t have an opinion about one over the other. They’re both cool albeit they both leak different metadata differently

  • Lemmchen@feddit.org
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    1 day ago

    Unfortunately there is no “Discord, but (federated/selfhostable) E2EE FLOSS” and at this point I don’t understand why. There isn’t even “Discord, but (centralized/proprietary) E2EE”.

  • cecilkorik@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    I ran Matrix for like a year, and pretty much hated every minute. It was fragile, complicated, and incredibly, bafflingly resource intensive. Matrix is an overengineered nightmare in my opinion, and it seems to be quickly distancing itself from self-hosters while pursuing enterprise usage. Neat technology, horrible implementation, misguided company.

    XMPP is a breath of fresh air in comparison. Just like we still use email everywhere (even for authentication nowadays, fun!), XMPP is not obsolete simply because it’s older. It’s a solid foundation, plenty extensible, and does almost everything I can imagine needing to do without unnecessary complexity.

    Matrix’s bridges are its killer feature, and it’s nice… when it works. But it’s simply not worth the headache of dealing with Matrix, in my opinion.

  • Madiator2011@piefed.social
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    1 day ago

    So I’m going to be wierd one but I prefer Matrix more. Though I tried both. So with XMPP most often I had with custom ports setup and in some cases they did not worker well if you have reverse proxy in front of it so in my case it required tinkering with xmpp and ssl setup to get it right. As resource usage I agree it’s lightweight. Now moving to Matrix I used to be long time Synapse user then I moved to ESS setup it had higher first time setup but once you get running it’s working wery well. The new MAS system improved user onboard now I can share link and registration token and user can register like on many websites no manual work need. Also they added new admin panel but there is one pain here some things are locked behind Pro with I’m not fan off. So ye for me Matrix is much better but it depends on your hardware and target number of people.

    • Eldaroth@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 day ago

      No weird opinions, you do you and if Matrix suits your needs, great. In general I like the idea and concept behind Matrix, was a bit clunky to get it going initially but afterwards, with Continuiwity as backend server I have to say I ran quite smooth. I guess for a small homelab/self hosted setup with maybe a hand full of users, XMPP sounds easier to maintain. But I guess I’ll have to find out, probably going to deploy Snikket or Ejabberd for a test run.

        • Eldaroth@lemmy.worldOP
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          14 hours ago

          You can actually change these ports if you run Snikket behind a reverse proxy according to their advanced configuration docs. But yeah, probably going with something else than Snikket as it doesn’t really suite into my current Podman/Traefik setup. At least not without a lot of tinkering which I don’t feel like at the moment 😅

  • AbidanYre@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    What’s your end goal?

    Simplex is easy to host for direct messaging and I had decent luck with Mattermost as a slack replacement.

  • Pika@sh.itjust.works
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    1 day ago

    I couldn’t get into matrix, but I was a huge fan of open fire. It’s interface was stupid easy for XMPP administration and for awhile I ran it no issue with my group of friends. granted we ended up just going back to discord not due to any issue with the server or protocol but because it was tedious trying to get people to switch off a platform that works for most people.

    • Eldaroth@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 day ago

      Yeah that’s the thing with a lot of these platforms, it’s dead simple for most people to download the app and create the account. You already loose two thirds (if not more) of the people as soon as the sign up process gets a bit more complicated, even more if they have to manage and secure any kind of secret (encryption keys) themselves. Not that it would be so difficult to save this stuff in a password manager, but I guess that’s already where a lot of people still fall short… What a uphill battle that was (still is) with some of my friends and family to get them to use a password manager for a start.

      • Pika@sh.itjust.works
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        3 hours ago

        There is also some that you just don’t want to put that type of responsibility onto either. I moved my grandfather to a password manager 5 or 6 years back. I reiterated at least 8 times do not forget this password if you do you will lose all passwords and need to do everything over again.

        He lasted 3 or 4 weeks then suddenly called me saying he couldn’t remember his password period. Like he tried for a good 40 minutes to guess what he may have done and was in a pretty intense panic because he didn’t want to have to change every service he had.

        Thankfully it had not been long enough for his file history backup to have deleted the file, so i just restored the last backup of his passwords.docx file and put it back where he was used to it. He lost those few weeks of new passwords but that was a lot better than losing every password.

        I’m not about to try and have him use a password manager again, he has decent enough password management skills since he doesn’t reuse passwords period, but like, it was far too risky putting him on a password manager again.

  • 0x30507DE@lemmy.today
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    1 day ago

    I haven’t tried running a matrix server, but ejabberd has been very solid, and it’s not too difficult to set up.