Space Facts@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 days agoPrioritieslemmy.worldimagemessage-square32fedilinkarrow-up1520arrow-down110
arrow-up1510arrow-down1imagePrioritieslemmy.worldSpace Facts@lemmy.world to memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 7 days agomessage-square32fedilink
minus-squareGreenKnight23@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkarrow-up13·7 days agobecause in the US you can’t kill yourself. if you try and fail you’ll be charged with a crime. corpses don’t generate profit. you will work until you die of “natural causes”.
minus-squarenightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyzlinkfedilinkarrow-up6·7 days agoFortunately, suicide by cop is a sure thing. Point a pencil in their direction and they’ll empty a clip on you.
minus-squareEcho Dot@feddit.uklinkfedilinkarrow-up2·edit-26 days agoJust don’t attempt to assassinate the president. Or else you risk getting arrested and having your shirt taken off, it’s all just a really uncomfortable interaction and not worth it.
minus-squaresome_kind_of_guy@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkarrow-up1·6 days agoStill fine to go get the TV, though, yeah? I’m trying to complete my home theatre setup
minus-squareREDACTED@infosec.publinkfedilinkarrow-up2arrow-down1·edit-27 days agoBecause commenter above feels like it
Wait, why?
because in the US you can’t kill yourself. if you try and fail you’ll be charged with a crime.
corpses don’t generate profit. you will work until you die of “natural causes”.
Fortunately, suicide by cop is a sure thing. Point a pencil in their direction and they’ll empty a clip on you.
Just don’t attempt to assassinate the president. Or else you risk getting arrested and having your shirt taken off, it’s all just a really uncomfortable interaction and not worth it.
Still fine to go get the TV, though, yeah? I’m trying to complete my home theatre setup
Because commenter above feels like it