When I was a manager, I did my own damn firing. Not because I enjoyed it, but because the people that worked for me were people, not an employee number. It was genuinely hard, so I damn well thought about it before I shitcanned them.
Last time I got laid off I got the email that I was being laid off three hours before my call with HR. Headquarters was on Eastern Time, so the layoff emails went out around 9am ET, but I was on a team that was mostly on Pacific Time so my call was after 9am PT. And I’m on Atlantic, so this was 10am and 1pm, and I was off that day. The clueless HR person offered me a moment to collect myself at the start of the call, as if I hadn’t already had plenty of time for that. Just one big annoyance.
HR stories really show how incompetent HR people are.
It’s almost like being completely disconnected from reality is a prerequisite for HR.
Anne’s smile is so perfect it almost looks AI, bro
This photo cracks me up every time I see it. Perfectly uncanny psychotic expression.
“Perfect” isn’t the first thing that comes to mind unless it’s “perfectly off-putting”.
Hard disagree. She’s such a lovely person and beautiful smiler. The personality enhances the smile a lot for me, I think.
But I guess in this context, a better choice of word would be “symmetrical”, for the purpose of describing the “AI” quality? 😅
It’s nothing against her personally, but unfortunately my brain is a visual indexer par excellence, I see her face and this pops in my mind instantly:
Thanking an employee for joining before termination sounds insincere and odd. I understand it’s to appear polite however I don’t think it should be best practice.
A more appropriate opening would be “Hi X, I have some difficult news to share.”
HR are professional gaslighters, that is literally their job.
Human Resources.
You, the human, a resource, for a company.
Their job is to manage and modify your behavior, as a resource, cattle with feelings.
…they are literally professional gaslighters.
It’s now “people and culture.”
I am writing to you today to inform you that I do not care.
Have a great day! =D
- When we all sing together, we sing in harmony
Hello sp3ctr4l,
We do not appreciate your tone as it doesn’t fit in our culture of respecting and hailing to corporate.
We will be writing you up for insubordination, violating our respect in the work place policy, and poor performance.
Here is your improvement action report.
Regards,
I hope this message finds you well,
… as that would be quite something, given that your office apparently … burst into flames, not too long ago?
You ok?
As per our previous emails, I’ll be reporting that to the city fire marshall as well, as you really would think a sprinkler system of some kind would have tiggered.
I’m sure you don’t still keep that pannini press in your office, so my only guess would be some kind of electrical outlet or breaker is not up to code.
Anyway, I’ll look over the IAR when I get back from the vacation I am currently on.
proceeds to call company lawyers
Hey sp3ctr4l, Please sit down. I have some difficult news to share. Unfortunately the company has decided to end your employment effective today. You will get your record of employment by email and enclosed is your package. Please sign and return as soon as possible.
Security will escort you out.
Bye.
proceeds to add sp3ctr4l onto the unsuitable candidates list
[Auto-Reply]:
Hey, appreciate the message, I’m currently on vacation.
I’ll respond as soon as I return to work!
I have had to do the termination not that long ago, it’s not that great for the other side either, thanking them for joining and not avoiding the meeting is mot insincere, it would be way more awkward if the employee would be avoiding the meeting
No one cares that you are politely ruining their life.
I’ve been fired into direct homelessness, and I made that HR cry.
Everyone should do that.
You need to feel that bad.
Otherwise, we will just keep going on with this inhuman system.
Yes, all interactions are the same, and there is no place for nuance, how could I forget this, apologies
Apology not accepted.
You need to be crying, when you strip people’s healthcare from them.
Not sure if you are aware, but there are countries that exist outside the US. Were you by any chance terminated from your job as a Geography teacher? i can see why
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So they knew it was coming.
I don’t know if they knew or not
The HR person will get fired if the facial recognition sees her not smiling like that.
Or Anne Hathaway when she’s about to sit down for dinner with Epstein and Gates.
A name in the files doesn’t mean they were involved in anything.
Care to share the actual allegations other than whatever you pull out of your ass?
Ew, really? Thanks for the red pill.
Too many teeth in that smile
Found the brit
Her and Julia Roberts have nightmare mouths.
Edit: I regret nothing.
I’ve never had a job where i could be fired, it sounds incredibly stressful.
Have you not had a job, or somehow they’ve never been allowed to fire you? I’m not playing dumb, I may actually be dumb - I just can’t imagine what job doesn’t carry a risk of being fired (except maybe tenured professor)?
I’ve been employed for a good 25 years of my life. I’ve either, been too valuable to fire and have had too much knowledge of where the bodies are buried, worked for myself, or worked for my parents company. I did have one normal job once a few years back, for 90 days and then it was a mutual resignation. Ive never really had a boss I’ve ever feared, ive always been on their “team”.
You are legitimately one of the luckiest people on the planet.
Right on! I get this energy as well. Never had anyone “manage” me. Make my own schedule and I project deep roots into everything I touch and improve cutting me loose would be extremely painful.
I did work somewhere where the COO wanted to can my ass. But they were constantly told I was way to valuable by the rest of the c-suite and cool it. Their problem was I wouldn’t kiss their ass and called them out on dumb ideas.
I show up to do work, not play politics. Turns out being good at what you do pays off sometimes.
Possibly a decent country that has labour laws rather than ‘fire at will’ BS?
Yeah, places with labour law make sure firing people is difficult. Bosses will bitch around but at least everyone have one less stress of not having food on the table.
you bet. it is. you get kicked out and have to find something very fast to pay for housing and food. fucked up
