Not going to offer many details on the where or how, as I don’t intend to dox myself, but suffice it to say that I will continue touching butts for an extended period. I don’t like feeling aroused by the act. These people placed trust in me. Trust that I mean them no harm and that I am safe to be around. I can certainly be both while aroused, but I’d rather not have to deal with this.
I’d prefer not to dissociate through work, but I can’t find another way to contextualize my experiences in a way that doesn’t leave me frustrated until I get home.
Find a place and a time to vent it.
Never talk to these people about it, ofc, but find a trusted person to talk to. The world wild internet cannot replace a trusted person.
Usually I’d speak to my partner about it, but the subject matter is peculiar and uncomfortable. Frankly, I was hoping to find a magic bullet rather than reasonable advice
Don’t we all?
I have a somewhat creative idea. Don’t know if you want to try it out, but I just tell it:
First, get hold of your partner’s butt. Then start to talk about the issue, but talk in a certain way:
You know the direct outcome of this already. In addition such talk is going to have impact for the future on your own thoughts and feelings, and the same for your partner.
This is my partner’s butt.
There are many like it, but this is mine.
My partner’s butt is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
I am nothing without this butt,
This butt is nothing without me.
Okay, I shouldn’t have laughed at this great idea, but it is humorous to imagine this scenario.
Idk if finding a magic bullet in your butt-touching job is gonna help against arousal tbh