Russia defeated in Ukraine
Trump sentenced to 400 years solitary confiment after being found guilty.
Drug found that can extend life to 500 years.
A quick death is too good for some
>invents immortality
>sentenced to life in prison
Obituary for CEOs of AI companies
people now able to humanize those they do not understand
Obituary, but I keep getting the wrong ones.
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
Trump Found Dead on Toilet
Netanyahu Assassinated, Israel Collapses
Putin Dead of Colon Cancer, Russia Retreats from Ukraine
Socialist Revolution in North Korea
Myanmar Rebels Unite and Overthrow Junta
Sudanese Anarchist Republic Recognized by UN General Assembly
Saudi Royal Family Flees Capital During Violent Uprising, Interim Government in Talks with Yemen
DRC Enacts and Enforces Stringent Labour Laws, Ebola Cases Low
Canada’s Green Party Elects first Woman Premier
China Enshrines Proportional Representation into Law
Socialist Revolution in North Korea
That would confuse so many right-winger heads.
Fr haha
I’ll just say it’s an obituary and be confident that I won’t need to say more.
There’s an old Soviet joke:
A man goes to a newspaper stand every day, buys a copy of Pravda, glances at the front cover, curses, and throws it away.
After a few weeks of this the seller just has to ask what’s going on: “why do you always look at the cover but never inside?” “I’m looking for an obituary.” “An obituary? But those are in the back!” “Oh no, the obituary I’m looking for will be on the front page.”
In rapid succession:
-
Sustainable energy now open-source
-
Rewilding commons yields global benefits
-
Atmospheric CO2 reaches pre-industrial levels
-
World Food Programme ends human hunger
-
World Rejoices in universal debt jubilee
-
Humanity achieves intergenerational wealth for all
-
First Contact Consensus: Together, We Ascend
-
The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup
“US Government collapses”
‘Massive Galactic Federation ship marks new beginning for humanity!’
Massive Galactic Orgy Underway!
“Law of equivalent exchange proven by science, Ted Cruz transmuted into enough pure energy to run planet for a century.”
Star Citizen announces 1.0 release date.
Users report that Half Life 3 was released last night. Valve spokesperson says: yeah we wanted to see how quickly people would notice
One day, my friend. At least Squadron has a Steam page and a release quarter now
“Every single AI company declared bankruptcy, all of their executives received the instant death penalty, and Donald Trump died a slow agonizing death over a 92-hour period.”
“Ram prices plummet- Solid state memory overstock reaching critical levels”







