I have friends who are Afghan who have had arranged marriages so this led me to be curious to ask, why does this practice still persist into the 21st century?
I have friends who are Afghan who have had arranged marriages so this led me to be curious to ask, why does this practice still persist into the 21st century?
I don’t understand why marriage is a thing at all any more. I view it like a form of slavery, as unpopular as that may seem to some. Like the whole spend a ton on a special day bullshit is a nonsense way for most people to start their lives in any part of the world. A dowry is a slave payment. Any disproportionate mismatch of income or roles should just be a reason to part ways, or come to some kind of agreement between those two individuals only. If two people are incompatible, or unable to compel one another to stay, they shouldn’t.
I look at it as various stages of human social evolution where some areas are closer to outright partnership slavery and some are slightly less. Very few people live with true equality and expectations in partnerships.
It’s not clear to my why you draw parallels with slavery. Spending a massive sum on the days is not an intrinsic prerequisite for marriage, neither is a dowry.
All marriage is, is a formal public oath between two people to spend the rest of their lives together, to look after each other and to share resources.
As an institution, it has many benefits including to the married people’s health. It also negefurs the state in that the mutual commitment to care it tends to reduce healthcare and social costs. So the state may provide some benefits.
The main disadvantage is that she stacks the dishwasher wrong.
The oath is a crutch for many and used as a leverage point. As a disabled guy with nothing to offer anyone, I have every reason to view marriage as the opposite, but I don’t. It’s not right to view a partnership as an oath in my opinion it implies a safety that makes no sense. A relationship is work. There is no right to the rest of someone’s life on either side should they change their mind or evolve in different directions; that is slavery. A relationship has no right of ownership over another person under any circumstances. If you want to go, you have the autonomy to do so. I’m fiercely loyal myself and form close relationships, but I have no right to say “I’m done” or hold any leverage over another person. I will ask them no to leave, I will make my case why they shouldn’t, but I have no right to stop them. This is true equality and freedom. It is a fundamental human right.
That is only slavery if the involved parties didn’t willingly commit to it. And it’s not as if divorce is non-existent.
The act of enslaving one’s self to pay debts and for other reasons is very common throughout history. One can willing make themselves a slave.
Divorce has long been restricted and still is in many places. It is all part of an evolving spectrum that inevitably results in true equality and the end of the practice in the very long term. It is a cornerstone of the underlying issue of misogyny in western culture. The only way to eliminate misogyny is to be truly equal and to be truly equal one must always possess full autonomy.
How does gay marriage fit into your claims of misogyny? I have at least 3 sets of gay friends who, after decades of waiting were delighted to make formal public promises to each other.
My argument has nothing to do with the sexes like this. Western cultural misogyny is a subtle blind spot overall. I’m willing to bet in many cases both parties are at risk of mistreatment. My point is about autonomy, so there is no difference in that vain, your still signing over autonomy to an arbitrator as a superior controlling entity.
Absolutely. And it’s an oath is just a commitment to work at it, and not just throw up hands at the earliest opportunity
It’s not a “a right to another’s life” it’s a commitment to a shared life. And yes, that commitment can not work out, which is why divorce is now thankfully pretty easy.
Not using any common definition of the word, no.
See, divorce - above. Some marriages don’t work out, or are abusive. That doesn’t mean there’s no value in marriage.
This is really narrow minded.
The term “arranged marriage” does not imply that the participants are not willing and eager. It’s not a disney story.