Well its mixed because he still wants to be able to force his mistresses to get them. He just wants the poor to keep reproducing at uncontrollable rates because the best way to have parents not care that you’re having sex with their children is to make sure they have too many to keep track of.

I am absolutely awestruck by the amount of bravery and critical thinking under stress that it must have taken to understand that you needed to sign a DNR for your 7 year old. Most parents in your situation would barely be able to add up 2+2, let alone comprehend enough of what the doctor was saying to make that kind of decision.

I’m also so happy for all of you that you wound up not needing that DNR. I hope she’s adapting well to her life with those limitations, but often children that age have enough neuroplasticity to work it out. She’s also certainly got parents who know how to put their own emotions aside and make sure she gets the care she needs, so under the circumstances she’s got a lot going for her. <3

And if you’re really dedicated to being a person who saves lives and its a big part of your personal identity, you’d also be risking the lives of the future people you’d be able to help and your identity as a person who saves lives. You can’t help this one person in this specific life threatening situation but there’s other peripartum hemorrhages you could help and many more you could try to keep out of that condition to begin with. But to do that you have to let this one person die despite knowing how to help them too. Absolute shit sandwich.

I’m working on developing a better work life balance but for the longest time working as a nurse has been the thing I stuck around on ye olde mortal coil for. It’s what was worth sticking around to try and get through all that therapy for. I won’t try to say it’s healthy but if I lost my license I don’t really have a whole lot left to stick around for.

Bingo. This is my interpretation as well.

On a related note, I’ve been thinking lately about how many older men have gone absolutely batshit on me for suggesting that they may not be able to safely pee standing up anymore. Its so hardwired in some of them that sometimes even bilateral amputees with enough dementia will insist that they need to stand up to pee. I’ve literally pulled back the blankets to show them their missing legs and they look right back up at me and keep yelling at me to get out of the way.

It’s happened so much at this point that I’m very desensitized to it. They’ll be threatening to kill me and I’m just “ah yes the good ol’ standing piss argument.” It’s practically as developmentally normal as a toddler not being able to share toys or a teenager having an unstable personal identity. Not sure what the female equivalent is, most of the violence I receive from that population seems to relate to trauma / fear related to sexual assault; they have difficulty calmly accepting assistance toileting because they’re worried I’m going to hurt them vs it being less common to be a pride issue with women. Although I suppose the pride just boils down to a fear of being taken advantage of for being weak.

TLDR; loss of independence is rough and in addition to the driving thing there’s a few other interesting manifestations.

Yeah when I got that report and responded all I could think was “this thread is basically incomprehensible. Why are these people arguing poetry vs theoretical physics? It’s like arguing whether or not TMNT is enjoyable based on it not being an accurate depiction of turtle biology???” There is a time and a place to get this heated about the fundamental concepts that define the universe we inhabit but a lemmy post about a Tumblr post that’s written like an overly dramatic fanfiction just ain’t it. The last time I got into an argument that dumb (somewhat coincidentally also on tumblr) was literally over half my life ago!

You hear this a lot in nursing too when people talk about how nursing assistants should make more. “But that’s what I make and I have more education and am responsible for more!” Correct, your pay should rise as well.

Well said. This is the only person I’ve ever personally banned and it’s because they went out of their way to start multiple fights over silly shit.

I recently listened to “A Wizards Guide to Defensive Baking” recently and I was NOT expecting YA fantasy fiction to go that hard on the subject of “heroism” being a term used to excuse the phenomenon of pushing people into dangerous jobs way too young to cover for the systemic failures and often outright corruption of existing power structures. I had a good few years experience in Healthcare beforehand but I graduated nursing school mid-covid and that book really spoke to me.

Somewhat coincidentally iirc it was actually released mid COVID as well, and I imagine had been worked on for years beforehand. So it’s interesting to me that the author picked up on the already existing manifestations of this phenomenon in a way that would speak so well to the epic clusterfuck that ultimately occurred.

an oldie but goodie

Yeah even if it is weird as shit where I am now is already weird as shit.

Soap is decreasing friction. The dental floss done correctly should apply compression to the tissue and force fluid out of the area. This is especially helpful if a lot of tugging has resulted in swelling.

If you’d like to edit the thing I wrote for free at 2am to include your edits for clarity and more localized bureaucratic knowledge, I’m happy to link right to you at the beginning. Other than that, you’re welcome.

If you’re as disabled as you say and either you have documentation (such as state benefits) or it’s just obvious I would try APS (adult protective services) over the cops. Things will move faster and more effectively if you do some of the legwork (hypothetically speaking) for them ahead of time.

1. Get in touch with the family that might take you in. Try to find three options who confirm they will take you. Write down or keep in a Google doc or whatever their: full names, phone numbers, email addresses, and physical addresses. The number one thing I see holding up cases like yours is housing, and if you have all those details worked out ahead of time a caseworker can do a lot more for you a lot faster. A lot of the time our psych social workers can get someone a uber / lyft or bus ticket easily enough, the problem is figuring out where they’re going. If you have the contact info of someone they can call right there and then who has already agreed to take you, you are a slam dunk open and shut case. Get three so you have backups.

2. Arrange for a ride locally such as a friend or acquaintance or literally anyone else who has a car and is willing to help you for 24-48 hours. This should not be hard to talk someone into. Many people want to help a person like you but don’t have the resources to house someone for weeks or months. For this acquantaince you are an easy way to help and feel good about themselves. Use that. Tell them to wait for you to contact them. Again, try to get three options set up so you have two failsafes.

3. AFTER you’ve done that, call your local APS (adult protective services) or file a report online. Do whatever you can to keep your family from knowing you called because it might take a few hours up to maybe even a day or two for them to get to you and you don’t want your family tipped off in the meantime. Tell them you’re being held by your family and kept from accessing your legal identifying documents like your birth certificate. If you get state benefits your documentation or papers regularly mailed to you may also have a compliance / abuse reporting hotline number somewhere on it. You could also try a crisis hotline through an organization that does community outreach. Tell them they have abused you in the past and you are in fear for your life. Tell them you HAVE A PLACE TO GO you just need help getting your documents. Again, you are easy to help in this situation, they don’t need to worry about setting you up with benefits or housing or anything, just transport maybe. This is what the numbers and addresses are for, they may want to confirm you have somewhere to go and even have options. Just play up the danger and that they’re keeping you from your documents. If you get an asshole worker wait six hours and try again (change of shift) or try calling a different agency or the next town over. You may also be able to find other places to call or worst case scenario call 911.

4. The SECOND they show up and if they’re able to get you those documents, get the hell out to that person who’s helping you locally and block your family and do not tell or hint or give them any other indication of where you’re going. Don’t even tell the person giving you a ride if you think it will get back to them. If necessary tell them an entirely different final destination and just get them to get you to the airport / bus terminal and get out.

5. while you’re waiting, get all your medications, medical equipment / supplies, any valuables or sentimental items, and 3-5 changes of clothes all in the same area of the house. Make sure to pack sentimental clothing but especially pack accessible clothing that’s easy for you to dress yourself with. Get them into a bag if you think you can do so discreetly, but a box or even just a pile in an out of the way corner is fine. If you have any special skin safe shampoo or other non-medicine but important toiletries stash them too or just make sure they’re all in the same place in the bathroom. Get everything into 1-3 discreet / hidden piles so you just need to throw them in a trash bag and go. If there’s any valuables you think your family will try to dispute ownership of, try to get any receipts or photos of you wearing or using them or texts from someone who bought them for you or whatever else you can find and put them in a Google drive folder or email to yourself. Worst case scenario though, be willing to leave some things behind if you have to.

Good luck and godspeed. :)

You know this is the recommended stance when deescalating violent psych patient because it keeps your hands visible (as in, not hiding something) and in front of your body / face in case they start swinging. I’ve never really felt comfortable doing it though and this kind of explains a possible reason why. I actually had a guy the other night who asked why everyone else was scared of him and I didn’t seem to be. There were probably a couple other reasons though (I’ve dealt with waaay wilder men, and also he mostly struck me as young, dumb, and loud, and dumb in the young sense not in the cognitively not there sense). But as far as this pose idk it just always seemed really patronizing to me. I usually stand more like One of these where at least one hand is on the neck or side of the head. Usually with my hands overlapping but my fingers not intertwined so they’re easy to separate and throw up in front of my face but not overtly defensive.

It’s usually a team effort. Usually when we’re disagreeing it’s some tiny little thing like how much sedation or pain or anxiety medication is needed, or which specific modality of treatment is indicated for something. The pain and anxiety thing can also go either way, sometimes it’s the nurses wanting more meds for the patient and sometimes they’re thinking less should be used and same for the doctors. And the other common disagreement is usually a disagreement of statistics vs lived experience, so the doctors are looking at the big picture of how things play out across large populations in places across the country or even world, vs nurses are thinking more in terms of their specific population and environment and what their specific team is trained and experienced at pulling off. Big picture vs individualized. There’s also some overlap though, they’re pushing more nurses especially in higher ed to learn more about stats and they’re pushing doctors to individualize things to their patients and teams.

This is all to say that there are a lot of extreme moments where we’ll both just look at each other like what in the actual fuck is happening. We don’t always agree on the exact solution but we can usually at least come to a rapid consensus that what is currently happening is unacceptable.

I was gonna say, their poor families! Here’s oping they get away clean and make it count!

Its like gentle passive parenting with 0 proffesional assistance when your kid has conduct disorder (pediatric precursor to antisocial personality, the newer, updated version of psychopathy). “Can you please put the knife down sweetie? Knives make people sad!”

“Plenty of staff” I’m calling bullshit right there. I don’t work corrections but I used to work forensic psych and they were the only part of that institutional system with worse staffing than us.

I wonder if this is due to gobal climate change or local efforts towards sustainable farming and forestry to reclaim areas the Sahara has encroached on in recent years. Could be both.