How did we end up in the Onion Timeline?

Those are eyephones

My favorite band is Enter the Haggis. I’ll give you a couple choices:

Swallowed by a Whale - one of their newest.

Gasoline - one of their most popular ones, a bit country-leaning.

To the Quick - a solid instrumental.

Then it would logically follow that smart watches would be called…

microphones.

If you’re browsing for torrents without a serious adblocker… why?

Short answer: it’s easier to grow it

“We’re sorry, using AI-based ad-blockers is a violation of our Terms of Service Agreement. Per the agreement terms, your account is now suspended and you’ve been charged an additional early termination fee, because fuck you.”

While I’m sure there will eventually be some grass-roots attempts, the providers will fight it to the death. A person can dream, though.

This is a great illustration of Chaotic Neutral

The $50 dickbutt DLC isn’t scheduled to be released until a month after the launch, but for an extra $70 you can get the limited edition collectors edition at launch, that comes with a cheaply made Mario-with-a-butt-instead-of-a-head limited edition figurine.

And for $40 you can also purchase the “getting started” pack–that includes a save file where we beat the game, so you don’t even have to play it. Your name, email address, and SSN will be on our first-to-finish list!

I’m gonna release a AAAAA game. It’ll cost $95 and when you install it, it’ll just be a romhack of Super Mario World changing all the enemy sprites into butts. There’ll be a link to file complaints that just points to a terrible image made in ms paint that says “lol f u”.

My stock prices gonna hit the moon.

I hope someday to have as much self confidence as someone who lists a “slightly shat” chair for $75.

First ammendment? Never heard of it.

No, the other answers explain why.

Tilt your head 90 degrees to one side. Bam! Now it flips up and down.

Looks pretty heckin wise

Capitalism. Specifically, the stock market. IPOs make good companies into bad companies.

Being owned by stockholders effectively removes any amount of “human” in the company’s choices and direction. There becomes a single goal, to which everything else is sacrificed: make stock prices go up in the short term. The C-suite execs will say all sorts of other shit, but any appearance of accountability or altruism is solely geared to making more money at any cost. Any leadership with a soul will be forced to either give up trying to be “good”, or they leave.

It’s definitely scary to dive into this, but try to remember: whatever the results of therapy, you’ll almost certainly be better for it on the other side. And your daughter will most likely be better off–because her parents will be in a better place, and because you’ll be setting a good example for her when she grows up and faces challenges.

Not sure what counts as “currently popular,” but World of Warcraft is a bit intimidating for new players, just in terms of the scope and changing seasons.

Path of Exile is a bit rough, too. One look at the skill tree is enough to turn some people away.

Donkey Riding by Great Big Sea. Currently my 2-year-old’s favorite.