Two members of Elon Musk’s DOGE have been given accounts on classified networks that hold highly guarded details about America’s nuclear weapons, two independent sources tell NPR.
Luke Farritor, a 23-year-old former SpaceX intern, and Adam Ramada, a Miami-based venture capitalist, have had accounts on the computer systems for at least two weeks, according to the sources who also have access to the networks.
Prior to their work at DOGE, neither Farritor nor Ramada appear to have had experience with either nuclear weapons or handling classified information.
All the things Putin commanded them to get for him…
Debating whether the government sysadmin tasked to hand out accounts put them in a “moron CEO jail” environment where they can’t actually do anything, or “lol screw it” and gave them all the access because he isn’t paid enough for this.
When Putin meets the rest of the KGB in hell they’re not going to believe how he did this.
“So you just convinced them to elect an idiot and they folded? And they don’t even care that you did it?!”
Stop acting like he was fairly elected
he was, but a ton of money was spent convincing the voters who to elect
plus the 24/7 coverage trump was getting by all the MSM last year.
One country clearly is in control of the president and all the “smart” people look past the damning evidence and point to Russia. You’ve been duped and they couldn’t be happier.
What?
Figured it would be Trump or Putin in their dementia to launch the birds. Or maybe Hegseth. Turns out it will be Big Balls from 4chan, living out his school shooter fantasy.
Oh, sure, a 23 yo intern and some VC bro fuckwad yeah, ok, yep, no security clearances whatsoever but fuck it, they just have Q clearance level access now, they just have SIPRnet access, their own accounts.
We already know other members of Elon’s parade of imbeciles at DOGE can’t even fucking figure out how to not expose their own remote logins to other government systems, and they’ve been getting those accounts hijacked by IP addresses in fucking Moscow already.
What could possibly go wrong?
DOGE continues to be the grandest scale, most insane, ongoing ‘cybersecurity event’/‘treason’ in history.
If anyone other than these fucks, in this exact situation, were doing this, they’d be getting black bagged by people who don’t exist and sent to facilities that don’t exist… possibly to many seperate facilities, at the same time, in many pieces.
I don’t even know what to say other than to drop into Tom Clancy lingo and say these fascist morons are actual clear and present dangers that warrant sending the guys that you’d send to go after the Rainbow Six guys if one of them goes rogue.
This is the Garry’s Mod version of GMan waltzing and trapezing into Black Mesa with a hoard of T posing Kleiners with physguns stuck in their crotches flailing about behind him, and then giving the two Kleiners that didn’t accidentally kill themselves by flinging props around, giving two of them just direct access, personal, remote log ins to, uh, the trunk lines set aside for for only secret, top secret, and all kinds of compartmentalized classifications levels of info.
Gman’s employers could be mapping out the network as we speak, spreading out laterally and trying to figure out ways to embed themselves with persistent presence.
jfc.
The accounts were exposed by design
Yeah, they were exposed so quickly that the only explanation is that it was done on purpose. Russia literally had access less than 15 minutes after the accounts were created. That’s not enough time for a brute force attack, unless the password was literally “password”. And even then, Russia would need to know the usernames in order to begin the brute force attack.
There was no hack. There was no leak. The secrets were sold and handed over voluntarily and this will continue for the foreseeable future.
… There are a lot of domain specific, contextually distinct ways one could interperet what you just said.
Could you be more precise?
I can think of at least two, totally different, practically opposite in meaning, ways of interpreting your comment, off the top of my head.
i got another pop-cultural metaphor for you: this is totally like that time voldemort took over the ministry of some shit who cares
And with the amount of incompetence we’ve seen I’m sure it’ll be sometime within the next month that 4chan has access to our nuclear weapons. Good job America, you gave a bunch of internet edgelords like Musk nuclear weapons.
I trust 4chan with nukes more then Musk
nah, 4chan gets nukes and immediately someone from /b/ will attempt to an hero the entire world cause it’d be funny
like you can skip right past “we could be evil with this” and go to “we can be indifferently malicious to everyone everywhere forever and pull off the most legendary, species-ending shitpost”
For the lulz in seconds.
Exactly.
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…neither Farritor nor Ramada appear to have had experience with… nuclear weapons…
This seems like a step in the direction of getting us all some experience with nuclear weapons. Thank you, Department Of Getting Evaporated!
The age of “meritocracy”…
How will Russia memorise all these different passwords??
They already gave KGB (IP addresses from Russia) username & passwords minutes after they were created.
Too late, they’ve already uploaded it all to Russia via Starlink
My first thought exactly. Bet Felon got paid a pretty penny and some nice Russian hookers for that slice of treason pie.
his twitter purchase was paid partially by putins oligarchs.
Better grab them and lock them up before they disseminate the stuff
I mean, I know there won’t be legal action for DOGE members, but I do love the part where we’re publishing their names. Let’s keep that up.
It’s waaaay too late for that.
They’re sending stuff directly to Russia via starlink, almost instantly after gaining access to networks. In at least one case someone with an IP in Russia tried to log in to one of the newly created DOGE accounts, with the real credentials.
Well… Nuclear apocalypse is certainly one way to ensure that we won’t need to pay federal income tax any longer.
Gee, I always thought we spend way to much money on the nuclear arsenal. Glad doge is there to make cuts.
Can’t wait for my check…
What could go wrong?
