People start talking shit about you/mocking you →you do nothing or brush it off or laugh it off →they start getting comfortable with it and continue doing it + you become “that shy dweeb, who it is ok to pick on, because he ain’t gon’ do sh- about it”

People start talking shit about you/mocking you →you insult them back →you somehow come off as “angry” and “talking back”

People start talking shit about you/mocking you →you resort to physical violence →you’re now “aggresive and violent”

You can’t win, can you? How do some people manage to make others respect them?

Yeah, I heard that the trick is to make them consistently suffer the consequences for disrespecting you, but how exactly are you supposed to do that, especially if the one disrespecting you is your boss/has another type leverege over you (yet, I’ve witnessed some people not allowing others to rail them while being in that position)

  • gigastasio@sh.itjust.works
    8·
    1 day ago

    You left out an option.

    People start talking shit about you/mocking you -> you call them out publicly, stand up for yourself, not with aggression but with assertiveness. “Dude, what the fuck is your problem? I’m not doing a damn thing and here you are disrespecting me for no reason. You that insecure? You gotta drag people down? How about you grow the fuck up. You wish you were more like me.”

    Problem with this, is that it takes a certain level of self confidence that doesn’t come easy for a lot of people. And you have to be ready for pushback, which is okay, because now if you have to get aggressive, it’s because someone else got aggressive first.

    Also, an ounce of prevention: Live your life in such a way that you’re true to yourself, exudes confidence, and doesn’t invite derision. Be proactively kind. Make friends and allies.

    If you have to work at that, then do so.

      • Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafeEnglish
        1·
        1 day ago

        Don’t bluff.

        You have to first not care about their opinion of you.

        I once worked with a guy who would just look at you with a blank look on his face when you said something stupid. He had the patience of a saint, and would just look at you.

        It’s a pretty amazing thing.

        Being completely unengaged and unreacting is a powerful tool. I’ve worked for some people who simply didn’t react to anything. Loved working for them. They taught me a lot.