This comment section: “Actually I’m pretty sure the bike fell over for reasons unrelated to the stick”

  • mommykink@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    You got it backwards mate. Young men are falling for those charlatans because they provide an easy solution to the loneliness epidemic (of which young men are the most likely victims).

    • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Well, most accurate would be a feedback loop, but the point still stands that it’s self-harm, regardless of why it arises.

    • Mongostein@lemmy.ca
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      9 months ago

      Except they don’t offer a solution. If anything, they make the problem worse. Their “solution” is to offer bullshit advice that will turn you in to a toxic person too. Normal people don’t want to hang out with the followers of Tate and the like, and because they’re all so unlikeable, they don’t want to hang out with each other.

      So it’s a feedback loop that gives these grifters more money while the followers get more loneliness. It’s sad, really.

    • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      to the loneliness epidemic (of which young men are the most likely victims).

      I read this statement of yours my initial reaction is not very complimentary. Instead of making assumptions on what you mean and assuming the worst, I’m interested in your view to see if I would find validity with it, or if my initial reaction was sound. Do you have any source you’d consider objective on this you’d recommend me reading to explain your position/definition on this?

      • mommykink@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        A simple search with the keywords “men” and “loneliness epidemic” should pull up plenty of resources on the topic. I’m on mobile right now and don’t feel like doing a whole deep-dive but here’s an article from NASW

        Quote:

        A 2020 research study found that age and gender can influence how lonely people feel. Younger people report more loneliness than older people, and men are more vulnerable to loneliness that is more intense than women.

        There’s plenty of debate to be had for whose “fault” this is, but the fact that young men are facing the brunt of the loneliness epidemic is a matter of fact that’s reinforced by countless polls.

        • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          A simple search with the keywords “men” and “loneliness epidemic” should pull up plenty of resources on the topic.

          Instead of me doing some rando search and assuming those were your views, I was asking for examples/articles on your views. I don’t think you want Joe Rogan or Tate talking for you, do you? Both of those assholes show up in those broad searches.

          I’m on mobile right now and don’t feel like doing a whole deep-dive but here’s an article from NASW

          'Gender roles appear to contribute to male adolescent loneliness. “In most cultures, men are expected to provide. Men are expected to lead,” says Romero. ’

          I don’t disagree that these ideas exist. Some cultures far more than others. In most western cultures however, the embrace of acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women work to combat this. The recognition that they’ve had it bad for hundreds of years and this new problem with men is a short term whiplash.

          Men should reject these ideas that men are the default providers or leaders. Believe those are true is an irrational trap. Men can be leaders or providers, but so can women.

          • FarmTaco@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            I don’t disagree that these ideas exist. Some cultures far more than others. In most western cultures however, the embrace of acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women work to combat this. The recognition that they’ve had it bad for hundreds of years and this new problem with men is a short term whiplash.

            What?

            “Have they tried rejecting their depression? what, are they stupid?”

            This is how it feels, and the reality of actually existing, Men are frequently valued based off of their potential(earning or otherwise) in the real world, just by saying you reject it isn’t going to make this suddenly not true and just clear everything up in your life.

            The solution to a young mans worry about his potential and place in life is… acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women? that is an opinion.

            • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              What?

              “Have they tried rejecting their depression? what, are they stupid?”

              Congrats! I never said that. First, Clinical Depression is a serious matter and shame on you for trying to suggest that any amount of just thinking differently would change the outcome. There are documented medical causes and treatments by qualified psychiatrists. Millions of people suffer from Clinical Depression and its a serious matter. For those in need, I highly recommend seeking help. There’s no shame it in. We’re all broken and need help sometimes.

              However, we’re not talking about Clinical Depression. We’re talking about social and cultural norms about the role of men and the disillusion that arises when those old ideas don’t match today’s reality.

              This is how it feels, and the reality of actually existing, Men are frequently valued based off of their potential(earning or otherwise) in the real world,

              By who? Who’s opinion do you care about that is making that judgement of you? What is THEIR motive for judging you such?

              just by saying you reject it isn’t going to make this suddenly not true and just clear everything up in your life.

              Of course not. If you’re looking for a ‘silver bullet’ solution you’re not going to find one. Humans a irrational, greedy, hurt, self interested, and angry. Welcome to life. However, recognized what is important to you instead of seeking validation from others is the start.

              The solution to a young mans worry about his potential and place in life is… acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women? that is an opinion.

              The acknowledgement is that women have faced many of these same questions for hundreds or thousands of years. This isn’t new. Its just new to young men. That recognition should do a few things:

              • Give you empathy that the women in your life you love have faced these struggles and you’ve been immune to them up to now. Talk to them. Ask them how they navigate life. While not all of it will, see if any of it can give you guidance too.
              • Realize you are not alone. No, not just other young men are in it with you, but lots of women too.
              • Start questioning where you derive your ‘worth’ from. Ask yourself why you’re letting other people define that for you. Ask if you agree with their definitions.
              • FarmTaco@lemmy.world
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                9 months ago

                Congrats! I never said that. First, Clinical Depression is a serious matter and shame on you for trying to suggest that any amount of just thinking differently would change the outcome.

                Oh my bad.

                This you?

                Men should reject these ideas that men are the default providers or leaders. Believe those are true is an irrational trap. Men can be leaders or providers, but so can women.

                Rejecting ideas -> changing the way they think

                And not only that, you for some reason think that everyone should change their opinions to match your world view.

                Sorry, I reject your giant wall of pedantry and goal post moving.

        • Isoprenoid@programming.dev
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          9 months ago

          Dude, I just watched the first 30 seconds of that video.

          The way that it is edited tells me that it is written for entertainment rather than informing (the quick cuts), intended to emotionally manipulate the audience (listen to the music), and likely biased because it is using an interview / podcast format. This is a secondary source of information, rather than a primary source.

          Good sources to read and share are primary sources e.g. peer reviewed research articles. If there are a research articles given in the video, then you should be sharing those, not the video.

          Here is an example of an article that is related to men and loneliness:

          https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6142169/

        • partial_accumen@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          I don’t have time at the moment for the whole 1h and 30 min, but I listened to the first 7 min and saw the topic titles for the remaining. So far its pretty agreeable ideas (Each person is responsible for their own happiness. Its not ‘owed’ to you by someone else. Seeking pure external validation is a path to ruin.) However, so far this doesn’t support the idea posted before of “young men are victims” yet. I will listen to the rest though before passing judgment.

    • nac82@lemm.ee
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      9 months ago

      its the world’s fault for me being a complete piece of shit

      Lmao, the victim complex of the most abusive subgroup of men on the planet is hilarious.

      • mommykink@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        Please, tell me more about your immunity to propaganda.

        The reality is that there’s a lot of money to be made in telling young, single, socially removed men what they want to hear and there are just as many people ready to make that money.

        Identifying a person as a victim of one thing isn’t an excuse for any other harm that they perpetuate.

        • nac82@lemm.ee
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          9 months ago

          I didn’t say anything about immunity to propaganda.

          Feel free to address what I said, though. I’m mocking the ironic victim complex of abusive individuals.

          • mommykink@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            My grevience is a very basic application of social Marxism.

            I’m saying that the “most abusive subgroup of men” aren’t born, they’re made through propaganda and charlatans. That makes them victims, which I have some sympathy for, even if they go on to perpetuate an awful cycle of misogyny. I’m just critical of these kinds of arguments like the OP which place the blame on the perpetuaters instead of the sources.

            • nac82@lemm.ee
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              9 months ago

              Despite this, shame is still a valid application of positive punishment to active participants of an abusive subgroup.

              Go be the carrot to somebody who needs a philosophy 101 course to justify defending actively harmful forms of propoganda from criticism. I’m not your guy, I have my own objectives in this discourse.

              Ultimately, none of this invalidates the observation of an ironic use of a victim complex.

              • mommykink@lemmy.world
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                9 months ago

                “Valid” in what sense? Of course you’re allowed to shame people who perpetuate terrible actions/thoughts against women. But when that group was literally created by and has grown through pre-existing, socially reinforced thoughts of shame and inadequacy, I’m going to hold you slightly responsible for that problem continuing.

                • nac82@lemm.ee
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                  9 months ago

                  I’m going to hold you responsible for defending them from criticism they need to face. You are creating a safe space for abusive ideologies to fester.

                  • Isoprenoid@programming.dev
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                    9 months ago

                    I’m going to hold you responsible for defending them from criticism they need to face.

                    These men already face the criticism, that is the driver pushing them further to become abusive and self-abusive.

                    What you are suggesting is cornering an animal, and then saying “Hey, we should corner it more because it’s acting aggressively.” and then acting surprised when it attacks you.

                    We need to offer these men a healthy way out which is culturally appropriate.

    • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Are they? or they want to be exactly because they think linke this? They want perfect supermodel women even though they look like shrek and any woman that is not flawless is “a crime and should die”. I’m not even talking about ugly woman, if a girl has acne, is chubbier, wear glasses etc they are “too ugly for them”. They have mental issues thara are just exploited by rogans and tates, not victims

      • Katrisia@lemm.ee
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        9 months ago

        Whoa, whoa! Miss, incels are misunderstood victims, never entitled and self-centered assholes. Take your downvote. (/s).

    • Franklin's Beard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      9 months ago

      Yep and it’s people like OP that only serve to reinforce their us vs them mentality. The political movements that paint masculinity as evil, or just simply stupid, paint with too broad of a brush. The western world moved mountains to understand and fix things like a lack of women in STEM - to the point that it became a meme. And likewise, society at large is so downright hostile to the struggle of the average joe who tries to do what society asked of him and talk about his problems that it’s also become a meme.

      The fact that they don’t see the dangerous appeal of a man who claims to have all the answers reminds me of another time in history. The “morally righteous” will fail us again.