bonus question:
what does it mean to be too online anymore?
They know what Lemmy is.
👏👏👏
Sometimes I see people rant about people in a way that makes me believe they rarely interact with anyone face to face. Complete lack of anything positive to say about others, can only discuss topics that mean something to themselves, no ability to put themselves in someone else’s shoes.
…you’re describing Lemmy users, aren’t you?
Lemmy, reddit, 4chan… You find them all around. If you ask me, it’s likely caused by childhood isolation. Kids who grow up in a tense environment or with certain disorders tend to be outcasts when growing up and this creates a bitterness towards the world.
It feels unfair that there is a way most people behave towards one another that you can not be a part of. And it’s always easier to blame the environment than to look inward, find out what is causing these feelings and how to combat them. This is easily said when you’re past your 30s, but a 7 year old kid does not have the capacity to do this level of self reflection. So the effects of being an outcast compound. At some point it just becomes easier to direct your anger at faceless strangers and avoid any kind of real social situations. And this, of course, also compounds.
But that’s just my armchair psychology take on it. I have been somewhat of an outcast up until college (although not nearly as bad as some other kids I’ve met). College was an eye-opener for me due to the acceptance and positivity that was around everyone. I noticed quickly that the happiest folks where the ones who spoke mostly of things they liked. It’s a cliche for a reason, but a positive attitude breeds positivity.
I think Lemmy is better about this. Certainly better than Reddit or 4chan. I think because of the small community. There are people itching for a fight or to troll, but by and large I’ve had way more positive interactions here than negative. I think when a community gets sufficiently large, it gets exhausting dealing with so many bitter, damaged people that civility is forgotten or civil members remove themselves as self-care.
I definitely agree with your last point. Everyone is uplifted by positivity.
I agree Lemmy contains more positivity. I would like to nominate the folks over at Stop Drinking for a positivity award. Also the communities that share wholesome moments. But for most of what I see, it’s bots posting news.
I think the median age is higher here and the mods more mature and experienced.
They spend so much time on Lemmy that they start replying to their own comments.
I can relate to this one.
When they seem to think it’s socially acceptable to scroll while hanging out with other people. I usually give the benefit of the doubt–“oh they’re responding to a text… right? oh damn, they are scrolling? and I’m sitting right here with them?”
yea, that’s not great
It isn’t?
Well I have a simple formula just for this:
If they believe things I believe, like things I like and go to the web pages I do: they’re a productive, well-socialized chad ubermensch patrician. No online issues there, even if they spend 24/7 online they must need it.
If they don’t believe things I believe, don’t like the things I like, and go to websites I avoid: they’re too online, probably an incel too and likely a terrorist in the making and sorely need to touch grass and should have their internet connection stopped.
spoiler
/s
A number of tells. Here’s my shortlist.
- Missing work, school, or other important obligations. Basically neglecting responsibilities.
- Preferring online interactions over face-to-face ones. On the phone all the time, even when with people.
- Anxious, irritable, or depressed when not online
- Losing track of time while online.
- Sleep deprived.
- Not sure how to answer when asked how much they’re online
Don’t ask how I know…
deleted by creator
Removed by mod
I noticed that a lot of my friends who are really online think that everyone will always agree with them.
My theory is that this happens because they are used to their algorithm only showing them content/comments of things they agree with and since that makes the bulk of interactions with other people, they think everyone is like that.
Also dehumanizing people who they aren’t politically aligned with. I think that people who “touch grass” more often, deal with people all over the political spectrum so they can separate the human side from the politics side.
These are just my theories btw I don’t have evidence aside from my anecdotes. A sample pool of like 10 people lol so clearly not enough
Doesn’t really matter if there’s an algorithm present, Lemmy is pretty unified in their opinions too.
I once ran out of questions I could answer on OKCupid.
Easier now after they deleted about 95% of them.
Nice try mom! I’m still not cleaning my room. Stay off my forum.
I dont know anymore, been here too long.
Sending me news links that are social media posts containing a link to a news article. Especially if it’s from Xitter: no way I’m logging into that place just to see replies.
It tells me that they didn’t read the article and that they expect me to care what the shit posters reacting to the headline think.
They use Lemmy
Sometimes I hear a remark during a conversation that just seems out of place, but is said with the air of a proverb, and that’s how I know it’s a reference to something popular on social media and that for me is too online.
“Lol”
I’ve heard someone actually say “poggers” in a real person to person conversation.
That’s a pretty wide net. Lol has been part of chat and text for ages. Even rarely online individuals instinctively use it in those environments. Or do you mean using it unironically in face to face conversations? Then I’d agree.
Yeah, spoken “lol” in place of saying “that’s funny” or, y’know, actually laughing.
Woof, yeah come across that a few times. Some gentle ribbing was usually enough to snap them out of it haha.
