I’ve always got on better with women than men. Always found more enjoyment in typically female pastimes. Decided not to show my power level. Never been happy with myself or my life as a result. I never enjoyed being something I’m not and all the friendships I made were based on a lie. Now at almost twice your age I figured out that maybe I was exposed to a wee bit much estrogen in utero. And that the reason I was infinitely more comfortable in the presence of women is because (at least mentally) I am one.
People always misunderstand gender as something that is either solely biological sex or solely a societal construct. There are actually a ton of weird endocrine, genetic, epigenetic, and environmental factors that contribute to the baseline state of the brain. All things considered it makes perfect sense that gender would be a spectrum of states with clusters around male and female. You should read a bit about it. Even if you aren’t some sort of atypical gender it’d still be interesting. And you might find that the LGBTQ community is more accepting of your unique brand of masculinity. Even before my revelation most of my friends were some flavour of queer, just because they’re largely nice people.
Also I grew up rurally (I’m pretty sure more rural than 99.9% of people here) and the people back home are largely fine with queer folk if they know them personally. Like a family member came out as bisexual and didn’t loose any friends over it. And it’s a really small place so if one person knows, everyone knows. I’m not going to assume it’s like that everywhere though. One key difference is that my particular rural community is approx 70% atheist.
But yeah make gay friends and look into the whole gender thing. It’s perfectly normal to question these things.
Kinda. But instead of a kamehameha, I just sleep with my opponents mother.