Anakin: “Aww, a piñata too! You shouldn’t have!”

Where does a 600 pound gorilla sit?

How else would one mass-produce gullible, uneducated voting cattle to exploit and fleece?

Countdown until Musk sues every single one of them for the crime, no treason of not giving him all their money.

Not at all. Political enemies of the Trump clan will be checked and balanced at every turn.

Look on the bright side, we’ll have so much raw data from the worst-managed possible country-sized control group. Except that they’ll probably react to attempts to document the results of their policies with book burnings and witch trials. Well, maybe we can smuggle in some camouflaged researchers or just watch the obituaries or something.

But EA clearly know how to rake in money with the yearly version of SportsGame 2021 2022 2023 2024. They are expected to make just as much cash by releasing the exact same movie every year. Who knows, maybe they’ll add microtransactions.

Countdown until it turns out that everybody associated with any competition to Musk’s companies just so happens to be a criminal Trump siccs his DOJ after: 5… 4…

The Onion writers: “Let’s go with this one, the real picks are too over the top.”

“Fuck that particular con, I have a president in my pocket now.”

Only until Trump is no longer the GOP’s darling. As soon as his grip on the Republican party’s balls is no longer all-encompassing, it’ll turn out that nobody ever really liked him or knew him at all and they actually were never really with him to begin with. Donald who again?

And even if he had been found guilty of a crime, then it would just have been a rigged trial. Innocence thus proven. Checkmate, laws.

Hey! HEY! That is a vile insinuation! They’d never do that and also they only suppress votes for the other party and those don’t count anyway, so what if they do it when it’s perfectly fine seeing how they could never win if they allowed the election to be run fairly, and in conclusion, voter suppression is great and everybody should do it (except for non-republicans).

Wait, what were we talking about again?

But he has money. If you’re rich, they let you do it.

“Stop or I will yell ‘stop’ again!”

More likely scenario:

People vote politicians who’ve been bribed to use taxpayer money to fast-track research into ways to enable AI to make people dependent on corporations while keeping the people docile and then squeezing them for all their money which is then used to enable the lifestyle in the comic for the corporation top knobs while keeping the wage-slaves free-market-empowered labourers too fed to die but too hungry to think about anything other than being grateful for the scraps they are allowed by their AI-fuelled overlords.

So basically the status quo, only now with AI. Yayy.

The Earth is round, so if you photograph straight ahead along the curvature of the planet, you can even photograph yourself from behind.

Flat-Earth theory disproved.

At least they can finally admit that they are not a car company.

Seems a bit far-fetched.

I mean Palpatine is a well-respected politician. Their kind wouldn’t lie. He has said himself that his side are the good guys, what more proof do you want?

Eh, just throw them over your shoulder and you’re good to go.