Thank God we’re the good guys!

They’re now saying that temperature was a sensor anomaly.

Same! Sometimes I type the email in Notepad/Wordpad first.

Oof. That felt personal.

Are you drinking your kin’s blood and tears?

“Hey girl, wanna take a ride on my big wet weiner?”

Gets 'em every time.

How to Spot Genocidal People 101.

When I think of superhuman origins, I think of a 5’7 elderly Indian man.

Truly the beacon of freedom in the Middle East.

Maybe start a charity and raise money that way?

Honestly, it must just feel like the whole world is against them.

We don’t know their mind. We don’t know their kind. Dark necessities are part of their design.

Though it also looks like a pretty sparse crowd relative to the recent pro-Palestinian rallies in Israel.

That’ll show 'em.

Seems like it’d be easier and more honest to have it just kill the parents.

Only slightly relevant, but you inspired me to dig out this amazing Korn/Taylor Swift mashup. They elevate each other.

Just when you think you got me figured out
The season’s already changing
I think it’s cool, you do what you do
And don’t try to save me

The whales said it’s cool, guys. Carry on.

He exposes people to chemical sludge every time he enters a room.

Or a Shark Tank-style infomercial product. “It’s The Orphanizer, From Ronco!”

Also, hair stylists really should be more specific. You said you style hair, suddenly there’s a difference!?