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pastermil@sh.itjust.works to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 年前

cylinder

sh.itjust.works

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cylinder

sh.itjust.works

pastermil@sh.itjust.works to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 年前
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  • Ex Nummis@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    “What is my purpose?”

    “You give handies to Elon Musk.”

    “Oh God.”

  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 年前

    Gross misuse of technology.

    We’re just going to ignore that there are open source plans online for motorized multi-axis articulated under-desk fleshlight mounts, and a library of videos with 1:1 motion mapping? Plus it has safety controls to ensure it doesn’t snap the “cylinder”.

    Go green! No need for a whole robot when you’re only looking to use a single part.

    (I mostly just wanted to curse others with knowledge of the robo-vagina. Can’t find the github anymore because a bunch of companies got in on it and dominate the search results now)

    • Pencilnoob@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      Perhaps you were thinking of?

      https://github.com/KinkyMakers/OSSM-hardware

      • themoken@startrek.website
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        1 年前

        I love that this exists and I think I know what I’m getting my wife for Christmas

      • ✺roguetrick✺@lemmy.world
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        1 年前

        Oh nice, they’ve got a Blåhaj one

        Image

    • Dasus@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      We’re just going to ignore that there are open source plans online for motorized multi-axis articulated under-desk fleshlight mounts, and a library of videos with 1:1 motion mapping? Plus it has safety controls to ensure it doesn’t snap the “cylinder”.

      I was not aware, but I’m proud of the community who did that.

  • reev@sh.itjust.works
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    1 年前

    “You slipped and fell?”

    “Yes.”

    “Penis first?”

    “Yes, now get me out of here.”

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      1 年前

      “I don’t know why patients try to lie. It’s not like it’s a big deal”

      [patient walks in with a butt object]

      “Oh gee, how’d it happen?”

      All they gotta do is not ask. I assume it’s not medically relevant. Dude’s got a cucumber in his butt, everybody knows how it happened. What’s the point in asking?

      • Entropywins@lemmy.world
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        1 年前

        You’ve obviously not had the same sorts of completely innocent accidents I’ve had throughout my life.

      • luciferofastora@lemmy.zip
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        1 年前

        Probably to make the patient squirm and see what excuse they come up with so the job isn’t as drab?

        More seriously, they need to know the circumstances of any accident to be aware of potential other complications or risk factors. That’s just a standard question they have to ask.

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          1 年前

          Do they ask the same way if an object is in a nose? “How’d the pea get up there kid? Did you fall on it?”

    • WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      Million to one shot, doc. Million to one.

    • rambling_lunatic@sh.itjust.works
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      1 年前

      It’s a cylinder.

    • SendMePhotos@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      https://www.youtube.com/shorts/z42ltXJBakI

  • JackRiddle@sh.itjust.works
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    1 年前

    Oh god I remember this

  • mechoman444@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    It’s his penis. The cylinder is his penis.

    • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      It’s an old meme from Reddit. Guy got his penis stuck in an m&ms tube.

      • Zorque@lemmy.world
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        1 年前

        People have been getting their penis stuck in things for as long as there have been holes.

        • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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          1 年前

          When I was in high school, my biology class did a stream study, and the class funny guy was documenting it with a big vhs camcorder. I was standing next to him when he saw a broken drain pipe sticking out of a wall. He pointed the camera at the pipe, and called to me. “Hey, themeatbridge. See that hole? Don’t stick your dick in that hole.”

          I laughed, because it was funny, and the class also thought it was funny when we watched it later. So funny that it became the thing everyone said to me for about 6 months. “Hey, themeatbridge, see that outlet?” “Hey, the meatbridge, see that taco?” You get the idea. I became known as the guy who has to be told not to stick his dick in things.

          It was almost 30 years ago, and I still have ptsd from it.

    • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      I also agree! I just want to clarify that I knew it was his penis before actually reading this comment because I’m smart too.

    • pastermil@sh.itjust.worksOP
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      1 年前

      Thanks, Sherlock! We couldn’ve figured it out without you!

  • pigup@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    There he goes again inventing things that already exist…

    • Sinatra@lemmings.world
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      1 年前

      I want it.

  • schema@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    Just tell the tesla employee that comes with the robot to fake its autonomy to let go.

  • Hupf@feddit.org
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    1 年前

    So long as the robot doesn’t accidentally drop raw chicken on the cylinder

  • Anticorp@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    1" diameter

    Oof! Self burn.

    • Dasus@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

    • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      Let’s hear your measurements big guy

      • Agrivar@lemmy.world
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        1 年前

        Geez, I hope you don’t think your 1" circumference is something to write home about!

        • Aqarius@lemmy.world
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          1 年前

          Diameter is not circumference.

          • Agrivar@lemmy.world
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            1 年前

            Duh. I was making a joke, implying that Pacattack didn’t know the difference.

  • Meursault@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    I understood that reference.

  • hondaguy97386@sh.itjust.works
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    1 年前

    Well… that escalated quickly.

  • Jake Farm@sopuli.xyz
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    1 年前

    This is the second post I have seen where someone has their cylinder stuck in something is this a meme now?

    • NounsAndWords@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      There was a reddit thread where a guy clearly got his dick stuck in a M&M mini tube and refused to admit it, referred to it as a “cylinder” stuck in a tube, and really stuck to the bit.

      • pastermil@sh.itjust.worksOP
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        1 年前

        Doing God’s work.

      • Jake Farm@sopuli.xyz
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        1 年前

        Lol, looks like he is still being teased for it.

      • glitch1985@lemmy.world
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        What’s a “reddit” grandpa?

  • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    I’m pretty sure I saw how this turns out on the Orville

  • undergroundoverground@lemmy.world
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    1 年前

    Sounds like they slipped and fell

  • Baggins@feddit.uk
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    1 年前

    First we had the wankpanzer, now we have the wankrobot.

    PS. I would also have accepted wankautomaton, wankpuppet, wankmechanic or wankandroid.

    • voracitude@lemmy.world
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      1 年前

      Wankdroid.

      • Baggins@feddit.uk
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        1 年前

        Yes!

Microblog Memes@lemmy.world

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