As per title, what’s the best worst present I could buy for under 100 dollars?
Donate the money to a charity in their name.
Like an honest Good Charity whose cause they believe in.
That way, you’ll have done a nice thing in their name but they’ll be a piece of shit for feeling bad about it when they find out what you did instead of giving them the money directly.
Genius.
Does anyone know who gets the tax receipt?
It’s a gift so of course you let them have the tax receipt. That way sometime next year they’ll end up getting 17% back of that as a refund on the taxes they had already paid.
That’s why I donate to The Human Fund with its motto “Money for People”.
Why be a dick?
Glittery slime for their child. It’s the cruelest thing you can buy someone and probably costs closer to $10.
Pennies. Individually wrapped.
Funny story, my uncle did something similar once as a gag gift for me and my siblings. He gave us each a wad of industrial shrink wrap (the kind used to wrap heavy machinery like boats for storage) with like $100 in coins inside. He had actually heat-gunned it to stick it all together. We had to spend the next day pulling it apart to get all the loonies and toonies out
How old are they? As that will completely change what presents fit your criteria.
What kind of a “friend” are you to ask this question??
Live insects. A quick amazon search indicates that you could buy 2,000 live crickets or 27,000 live ladybugs.
I start jumping off walls if I see a single roach. If I got a thousand roaches flying in my face I’d surely burn myself alive.
“This is fine.”
superglue the money to birthday card
A sync for lemmy lifetime subscription
Convert it all to pennies and give it to your friend that way.
A glitter bomb?
5x $20 lottery tickets. Most lottery tickets have a 1:3 - 1:5 win rate, so if you’re lucky enough he might win literally nothing. Nothing else on this list gives the friend hope. Hope unfulfilled is the definition of cruelty.
An office chair. For that price it will be terrible and too big to do anything with it besides gifting it or throwing it out.
What did they do to you??
A glitterbomb and a donation to something they really don’t like. A stripper of the gender they’re not interested in. If they’re italian, throw in a square-shaped pineapple pizza, too.
