The chip implanted in your brain is no longer supported and won’t get any new security updates. Please purchase a new one.
Upgrade now to our pro plan or usage of essential body functions* will require watching a short (5min) ad pause.
*Essential body function include, but are not limited to: Sleeping, eating, drinking, using the toilet, holding a thought for longer than 5 seconds
⚪ Yes, I want to upgrade now.
⚪ Ask me again later.
It’s no longer supported, but you’ll still get ads.
That’s the best news all day! The open source community will replace the software with something less buggy, more useful more secure, and add-free.
Brian Chip remains the property of Brian Chip Inc, any attempt to modify Brian Chip firmware is against the T&C of Brian Chip. Brian Chip Inc reserves the right to take action to protect it’s property through various means including, but not limited to,: legal action, locking down of bodily functions, and total destruction of adjacent wetware.
I’ll just wait 15 years for the OpenMind project to release the first fully open source brain chip.
Then spend the remainder of my life in a coma because I flashed the wrong boot image.
The ad gets into your brain. just like this liquid gets into this egg. Although in reality. it’s not liquid, but gamma radiation.
The ad-less experience is a scam, you don’t get any “ad’s” but you still get nothing but sponsored dreams that are 15 minutes of talking about a product 1 minute of enough “content” to get the thumbnail then 30 minutes of more sponsored content.
What you really need to do to get the best out of your sleep is upgrade to the new Premium Plus! Dream package with select artisan videos from your favorite artists from across the neuronet, for only $59.99 you can enjoy up to five free unique tracks with the option to unlock new Tracks for only an additional $9.99 a track that is a full $20 less than the original premium package when prompted in your ad-less sleep to unlock the additional package be_sure_to_have_a_scan_of_your_ID_and_rectal_cavity_for_verification act now and get a free 15 second sample of ourhuman generated track, now back to your premium ad-less content.
This is the dream
“Now, if you’re part of Control Group Kepler-Seven, we implanted a tiny microchip about the size of a postcard into your skull. Most likely you’ve forgotten it’s even there, but if it starts vibrating and beeping during this next test, let us know, because that means it’s about to hit five hundred degrees, so we’re gonna need to go ahead and get that out of you pretty fast.”
A Doritos ad!
So you can drift asleep thinking - “Boy, do I feel refreshed!”If you got a brain chip with closed source software, you needed that brain chip
If Jensen’s brain had ads I would have actually empathised with him instead of sardonically yelling “oh, fuck off” when he said “I never asked for this”.
