MJ calls what happened to her in Zion national park “small ‘T’ trauma”. She knows women have experienced worse from their partners. But she still feels the anger of being left behind on a hike by her now ex. “It brings up stuff in my body that maybe I have not cleared out yet,” she said.

Five years ago, MJ and a new partner – he was not exactly her boyfriend, and the pair were not exclusive – traveled from Los Angeles to Utah for an adventure getaway. MJ, who is 38 and works in PR, was looking forward to exploring Zion’s striking scenery; its vast sandstone canyon and pristine wading trails were on the list. But on the morning of their big hike, MJ was not feeling well. She could not shake the feeling that something was “off”; indeed, MJ would learn on this trip that her partner was seeing other women.

As they made their way up Angel’s Landing, MJ’s partner started walking faster than her. “I could tell it was getting on his nerves that I was slow,” she said. “I was like, ‘Fuck it, just go ahead of me.’” He did without hesitation.

When she caught up at the top of the mountain, they took a picture together. Then her partner hiked down the mountain with a woman he had met on the way up, leaving MJ to finish by herself. They broke up shortly after that trip. (MJ asked to be referred to by her initials for the sake of speaking openly about a past relationship.)

Last month, MJ opened TikTok and heard the phrase “alpine divorce”, a label she now attaches to her experience in Zion.

  • SaraTonin@lemmy.world
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    3 hours ago

    the pair were not exclusive

    MJ would learn on this trip that her partner was seeing other women

    …isn’t that was “not exclusive” means?

    • Velma@lemmy.today
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      3 hours ago

      Casual partners may still prefer to know if their partner is sleeping with others for a variety of reasons. The first one that comes to mind is health.

      • SaraTonin@lemmy.world
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        3 hours ago

        Sure. My point is, though, isn’t that already implied by them not being exclusive?

        • Velma@lemmy.today
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          3 hours ago

          They could be not exclusive but still agree to let the other know when they introduce a new sex partner.

          Y’all never heard of safe sex?

    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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      3 hours ago

      yes, but people are emotional and they don’t abide by their own terms

      every casual relationship i ever had was never actually casual. it was just full on monogamy with a ‘get out of jail if someone better comes along’ card built in.