I cannot tell you how many times I’ve made a noise on the toilet and been so embarrassed that I actually end up waiting for anyone who heard it to leave, just so I can stay anonymous

I don’t think there will be anyone who objects to this. There is nothing in a bathroom worth listening to. Nobody socializes in a bathroom. It’s as quiet as a library, and any bodily noise completely gives you away

Please just add background music to bathrooms. Even with quiet background music, you could at least strategically defecate to the tempo to make it sound like it’s part of the song

I hate public bathrooms, please make them bearable

  • boobookittyfrick@lemmy.zip
    5·
    12 hours ago

    Usually when I’m in a public bathroom I’m listening to the guy next to me giving birth to a butt baby and all the wet plops that go with it.

    • insanemantis@lemmy.worldOP
      2·
      10 hours ago

      Plops are the worst, I wish I didn’t have to hear those. Makes me vividly imagine their poop being squeezed out of their anus

      • boobookittyfrick@lemmy.zip
        2·
        4 hours ago

        When I was younger I got curious and watched my butthole fart in the mirror and now whenever I hear a fart I picture their butthole

        • insanemantis@lemmy.worldOP
          2·
          42 minutes ago

          I mean, a fart literally is what it is and sounds like what it sounds like precisely because of the anus having the shape that it has. Can’t really unsee that

          • boobookittyfrick@lemmy.zip
            1·
            21 minutes ago

            It doesn’t just stay in one place tho. It opens up for a seconds and vibrates… sometimes it squeezes shut a bit just before the big reveal