I may need to say something that is (seemingly) nice about someone, but I’d prefer it be very subtly backhanded or nearly believable hyperbole.
Edit: I realized that I was imagining something like how the Colbert Report was done where it’s easy to believe I’m agreeing when really I’m spoofing.
You seem like management material.
Try to channel your best Ron Swanson while saying it.
Like middle management if you want to get extra spicy and yet still subtle
You’re at the top of the bell curve!
The best part is that it isn’t really an insult.
Statistically speaking, any given person is most likely to be near the peak of the bell curve of a given thing.
Someone being offended by it means that they think they’re above average, and you think they’re average. There’s nothing wrong with being average…most people are.
Which always reminds me of a saying: When you’re trying to comprehend human behavior you need to remember how dumb the average human is… Then remember that half of humans are dumber than that.
George Carlin!
I like that one!
“I hope the rest of your day is as pleasant as you are”
Awe thanks!
Some I’ve collected over the years.
- “At this point, you can only impress me.”
- “My opinion of you can only go up from here”
- “The bar was on the ground and you brought a shovel.”
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“Would you think less of me if ____.” “I could never think less of you.”
-
Britta says “nobody respects me any less as a political activist, right?”
Long pause…
Jeff: “the level to which we respect you as a political activist has definitely not changed”
-
- “You aren’t the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don’t die”
- Unencumbered by the thought process.
- “I’m guessing you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling.” - Malcolm Reynolds
- “My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.” Malcolm Reynolds
- “You’re the reason we have warning labels.”
- “They only got two brain cells and both of them are fighting for third place.”
- “It’s impossible to underestimate you.”
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“Don’t underestimate me.” “I couldn’t possibly.”
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- “If you were half as smart as you think you are, you’d be twice as smart as you really are.”
- “If you ever had a clever thought, it died alone and afraid.”
- “They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.”
- “He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.” - Abraham Lincoln
- “May I ask what’s on your mind, if you’ll forgive the overstatement?”
- “You could hide your own Easter eggs.”
- “I can explain it again, if you’d like, but I can’t understand for you.”
- “He is a modest man with much to be modest about.”
- “I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong”
- “Your secret is safe with my indifference.”
How are any of these SUBTLE
I think that greatly depends on to whom you are speaking.
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The series Ted Lasso is chock full of these, but my favorite was after Jade meets Rupert and he leaves, she says, “Well, he seems rich.”
Like it almost sounds like a compliment, but only if you lack the self-awareness and empathy of someone who isn’t rich.
You remind me of myself
“You remind me of you when I was your age.”
“Wow you look good today.”
I had someone tell a coworker “you look better” when he was trying to give a compliment, and it came out so uncomplimentary we were all laughing when he left.
It may be backhanded or not
I think it’s backhanded because it implies that the person doesn’t usually look good any other day.
The only one I’ve ever pulled off on the spur of a moment unintentionally is when my asshole stepdad broke his foot and I ended up casually quipping to him, “you gotta work hard in order to get a leg up in the world”.
I also just remembered that I later told him he’s got to put his foot down on some issue his job was complaining about.
“I love that you’re not afraid to say just whatever comes to you.”
See you later!
Not if I see you first.
Well, not terribly subtle, but if you are fighting with your spouse and they complain that you never say anything nice about their family, you can respond with:
“Well, I have to say that your in-laws are better than my in-laws”
This works only in Dutch. I used to work in the service industry, where every now and then you’d have rude or ungrateful people.
In Dutch, the formal way of saying ‘thank you’ is ‘Dank u’, but that’s very close in pronunciation to French ‘dans cul’, meaning ‘in the ass’.
So with people I secretly loathed I would thank them with an ever so slight French twang.
that’s great
In the Southern United States men will do this with Northern men passing through. Mumbling yes ma’am instead of yes man.
Real cuntish if you ask me, I think they need a taste of their own medicine.
(i subtlety downvoted you)
And misspelled “subtly”? You’re really typing with both fists today!
Me do good?
Oh, your hair is (pause) fine.
I envy those who have never met you
Good go to
