I was thinking about the phrase ‘The pot calling the kettle black’. It comes from a time where cooking was done over open fires and cookware would become visibly ashy. (Fun fact: It first appears and was perhaps coined by Cervantes in Don Quixote!)
What are some other idioms that have lost their literal connection to time? What would be a good modern replacement?
“Avoiding things like the plague” because people did not actually seem to want to avoid the plague last time around.
Too soon.
Or not, really.
We’re the ones who survived, we’re allowed to joke about it
Oh, I didn’t say not to joke about it. I just really miss Herman Cain, OK?
/s you animals.
Avoid things like the crypto xD or the AI slop to make it super modern
I think the outdated/obsolete nature of terms in many idioms is what makes them charming.
It also makes it pretty clear you aren’t using them in a literal sense. If your idioms are too new/unfamiliar and your terminology is too modern/relevant then people might just think you’re being literal and not idiomatic.
“Have your cake and eat it too” doesn’t really make sense. Cake is not rare or expensive enough that simply possessing it feels good. If you have cake, all you want is to eat it.
The italian version, “you want a full barrel and drunk wife” illustrates the same situation much more clearly.
That’s because it’s backwards. Should be “eat your cake and have it too”
Edit: While that preserves the form and is recognizable as the common saying, it makes the meaning clearer if phrased as “Eat your cake and still have it”.
Thank you Unabomber
Also wanting to eat your cake and have it too is supposed to imply you’re like a toddler having a tantrum because you’re just coming to terms with the rules of object permanence: a person playing peekaboo or hide-and-seek can disappear and still come back, but if you eat your cake it will be ALL GONE!!!
Mouselemming thank goodness you’re still here. I scrolled up and you disappeared for a second, I was so worried!
There’s a reason that is seen as greedy and foolish.
Even flipped, it’s still weird in English with “Having cake” meaning “Eating cake” in most contexts anyway.
Better stated as “… and still have it”, come to think of it.
Ted, is that you?
You cannot have a cake in your possession and also eat that cake. Once you eat it, it is gone.
I cannot possess cake without eating it
I cannot possess cake because I’m not a demon. Yet.
Technically its not gone, just inside you.
Oof ouch my bone satchel
Ted Kaczynski has entered the chat.
I was confused by this one too, but then I thought about it in the context of a wedding cake; you want to have it as a beautiful thing to show off to all of your guests, but you also want everyone to enjoy how good it tastes as a desert. You can’t have both simultaneously, so you have to pick
When I was a kid, I remember asking my mom about this phrase because it made no sense to me. Why in the world would one even want a cake if they weren’t going to eat it? What is the point?! (I have always been particularly fond of cake — eating it, that is — who cares if it’s pretty if it tastes good?)
According to legend, some people have what’s called “deferred gratification”, by which they drive pleasure out of knowing that they will get to eat the cake later.
I don’t get it either. I think it’s a myth.
But maybe you will someday in the future…
But I want it now!
Just desserts is another one.
“Burning the midnight oil”
Your using your battery without a wall charger, huh?
Good one! I would offer ‘Draining the house battery’ as a replacement but it doesn’t really have a ring to. Maybe ‘You’ve been living in low blue light mode’. No that’s even worse! somebody help me here 😅.
Entering single digits? Only makes sense for those with 24h time I guess
Never getting your phone on the charger?
24/7 bandwidth draw?
Ignite the midnight petroleum.
Eating a dead horse - not unless you buy the budget beef mince at Tesco
Read like rabbits - rabbits can’t read or even hold books
Nip it in the butt - that’s sexual assault, you’re not allowed to do that any more
Get down off your high horse - you’re not allowed to get animals high either
Kids should be shorn and not herd - goats have hair, not wool, and can’t be shorn. Their natural tendency to herd is a difficult behaviour to break.
Under the weather - unless you’re a pilot you’re going to be under the weather most of the time
A blessing in the skies - unless your bishop is a pilot too, that’s not going to happen.
Fight off more than you can chew - I don’t know where to start with this one,
Boneappletea
You almost got me.
surely there’s a /s or a trollface i’m missing
I’m not pulling your Greg, if that’s what you mean.
You leave my Greg alone. He’s perfectly capable pulling himself & if he needs help I have gloves!
I was half expecting that to have been posted by LadyMondegreen
deleted by creator
Don’t put the cart before the horse.
Don’t submit your post before you write it.“Keep the carriage in the wake of the mare.”
Don’t buy crypto before it’s settled lol
All the horse ones because we don’t use horses anymore. There a ton of them.
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Who tf gets a gift horse?
Saddle up. Who tf has a saddle?
Hold your horses. Who tf has horses to hold?
Get off your high horse. Who tf has a high horse?
Beat a dead horse. WTF.
Great examples! ‘champing at the bit’ also comes to mind. I think cars fill in pretty nicely as a horse substitute. ‘Saddle up’ has ‘buckle up’. Hold your horses has ‘Hit your brakes’. As for gift horses… ‘Don’t look a gift car under the hood?’ Hmm doesn’t quite work
“Don’t check the resale value of a gift car” maybe
But presumably a gift horse is worth something as long as it walks. This summer my kid got a “gift car” and it was critical look at both the undercarriage and the resale value. Thank goodness he was only out the cost of a tow and mechanics inspection
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Don’t check the dipstick of a gifted car.
They have the same meaning that you’re trying see if the horse is healthy and the car’s engine is in good condition.
Quit horsing around. You’re really putting the cart before the horse.
Edit: sorry, gotta go. I need to see a man about a horse.
To update replace all with car.
Dont look under the hood of a gift car.
Buckle up.
Hold your engine.
Get out of your limousine.
Turn the key on a drowned engine.
You could still use Hold your horses because the car has horse power. Pressing the brake pedal literally holds your horses.
But that in itself is an outdated idiom. A car has engine power.
I dunno. Yamiks still beats on horses… In both ways.
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Who tf gets a gift horse?
A buddy in college accidentally said “gifted horse“. Then his girlfriend said “very much so” and we never let him hear the end of it
In my home country they say “Cheap as Onions” (eq in English : Cheap as Dirt)
Looking at the prices on Onions nowadays …
A stitch in time saves nine.
This refers to a time when clothes were hard to come by and often homemade. If they tore, a small tear could be fixed with one stitch of needle and thread, but if let go too long, it would take many more stitches to repair a bigger rip.
Change your oil (or tires) in time, or change your car.
This is still relevant, please take care of your clothes.
FYI this can still happen on liquid propane stoves, so not totally lost to time.
Maybe “Kill two birds with one stone”, because who hunts with stones anymore?
As a software dev I’ll offer ‘Kill two bugs with one patch’ as a replacement.
bugs
Touché!
99 different bugs in the code, 99 different bugs. You take one out, patch it away, 463 different bugs in the code 🎶
and put 4 new ones in :)
I think I remember seeing a PETA post years ago that suggested “feed two birds with one scone”
Yeah that one bugs me. I can feed multiple birds with one scone easily. I’m putting in too much effort here, but this recipe has the macronutrient mass of a single scone at 90g. The average crow weighs about 300-600g. I chose it because it’s a common bird that would be interested in scone and that people like to feed, that’s on the bigger end of birds people feed (outside waterfowl). One crow isn’t eating nearly a third of its mass in one go, a sixth maybe. Songbirds aren’t even getting close to that.
Killing two birds with one stone implies some skill or fortune. You wouldn’t say it to describe picking up tomorrow’s groceries with today’s. Feeding two birds with one scone is only difficult or fortunate if those birds are geese, and even then I assume the only reason two managed to get their bills on that thing is because they’re fighting over it.
Also scones are terrible for the health of birds as are all breads. It’s frankly on point that peta would be dumb enough to make their animal friendly term equally as harmful to animals.
I prefer “Get two birds stoned at once”
“it’s a twofer!”
kinda
“Pulling my leg.” Meaning you are making something up/joking at someones expense.
It does not have any real connection to the present. The idiom came about in the mid-19th century. There’s two competing theories about how it came about. The prevailing theory is that pick pockets, particularly child pick pockets, would pull on people legs to distract their mark. The darker theory is that it was related to pulling someone’s legs when they were hanged in order to finish the ordeal if they didn’t die from the initial drop.
Great example! That one is so ingrained that I never even realised it didn’t make literal sense! Maybe a modern replacement could be something like ‘You’re hiding a camera’
Cap
Wearing metas?
In Portuguese the equivalent expression is timeless: “o sujo falando do mal lavado” (the dirty one talking about the badly washed).
Always love idioms from other languages. Had a book called “Idioms Delight” that explored equivalents from several different cultures/languages.
“Did you bring the (evening newspaper) with you?” I’ve used this in different countries, the newspaper referred to is one which historically was sold in the afternoon, not morning. And I ask it of anyone who comes to work late. Now, at least here, all the newspapers come out in the morning, so I just get confused stares.
That sounds like a great candidate for a modern replacement if I’ve ever heard one! What’s something that you can only get at night these days? Seems like everything, especially information, is 24 hours now. Maybe someone more creative than me could chime in?
Hurried right over after dessert, then?
There’s tons of replacements, they’re not directly equivalent but equally snarky: “Hey part-timer” “Half day?” “Stop by for some coffee?”
“Extra extra read all about it.” Said because it was an extra leaflet to the daily newspaper published later in the day.
I always thought of that idiom as the pot (something generally cast iron and not polished) calling the kettle (something that is polished and therefore reflective) black.
Being that the pot sees itself in the reflection, but calls the kettle that as a derogatory thing, unknowing of it’s personal alignment.
I think that the phrase is so old that the difference between a pot and a kettle might have been fairly subtle differences in shape, but both would be black cast iron.
Which is nowhere near as profound as your interpretation.
whats the point of a modern replacement? idioms connect us across time and when they really have not modern sense (which there is enough understanding of cookware I don’t think we hit that with pot and kettle) then it becomes an interesting backstory.
No real reason, just something to talk about while we all wait around to die really 🤷. I agree with your sentiment - the stories and imagery behind old idioms actually make them more interesting, I dont think they’ll be going anywhere soon!
