What qualities do you covet?

      • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
        2·
        14 days ago

        If it was me (which it was), I’d set a reminder and then every time I got a notification, I’d push it off until later. Also, I’d hate my(past)self for making the commitment to have to deal with the notifications.

        • Albbi@lemmy.ca
          2·
          14 days ago

          Ugh, notifications to do something are the worst! My notification to pay my credit card comes up and I’m like, just leave me alone already! I’ll do it tomorrow!

  • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
    12·
    15 days ago

    I wish I were less anxious/self-conscious. It’s weird because outwardly almost no one knows that I am. I’m charismatic and easy to talk to, a natural leader in the workplace (I’ve managed now at every job I’ve held) and I’m a loving and supportive father. But deep down I’m still self-conscious as hell. I experience a lot of spotlight syndrome and I feel like I dress frumpy, walk weird, etc. I have a lot of social anxiety and think every situation/confrontation is going to be a worst-case scenario. Had to take 5 weeks off of work for a stress fracture and allowed myself to believe leading up to it that my (typically supportive) boss was going to be angry or petty or challenge me over it. He was extremely supportive and told me to just take the time off and not to worry about putting out the fires at work.

    I don’t know how I conditioned myself to be like this. Probably a side-effecting of growing up fat and all the self-hate that came with it. I got rid of the fat a lot time ago, but I don’t think that shit ever really left me. Fortunately my daughter does not share my lack of confidence. That kid is miles ahead of her peers and I’m so proud of her.

  • Flax@feddit.ukEnglish
    131·
    15 days ago

    I wish I was more Christlike.

    No matter what you believe about Christianity, you can’t deny that He is a pretty good role model.

  • insaneinthemembrane@lemmy.world
    9·
    15 days ago

    Wish I could negotiate and haggle, I just don’t want to, it doesn’t feel good to me. I’d rather accept or refuse the offer and move on.

      • insaneinthemembrane@lemmy.world
        10·
        15 days ago

        It’s more to do with honesty. If the seller says it’s worth this much and that’s what they need to charge to cover their costs, then I would like to think that’s true because if it isn’t, they’re lying.

        • papalonian@lemmy.world
          2·
          14 days ago

          I think this might be where it comes from for me, too. If you say it’s with x, and I think it’s worth z, I don’t want to insult you or assume you’re trying to scam me by asking for x, but I also don’t want to pay much more than z.

          The concept of some mystical “y” living in the middle is lost to me and it’s socially impossible to reach “y” without me calling you a scammer or you calling me cheap, so no deal will be made today.

  • Dorkyd68@lemmy.world
    9·
    15 days ago

    I wish I didn’t have an addictive personality. I just wanna be a casual heroin user, is that too much to ask for? I don’t want to sell my mom’s TV for another hit rather have a job and pay for my own scores. Ya know responsibly

    • cheese_greater@lemmy.worldOP
      5·
      15 days ago

      I don’t think think its necessarily an addictive personality that makes one susceptible to heroin. Heroin (especially in the format its consumed) is basically pure pleasure/heaven all at once since all the RoA are all IV/snort/smoke, anyone would end up with a problem after like a week.

      Can I ask what heroin seems to be acting as a balm or buffer for?

    • bizarroland@fedia.io
      4·
      15 days ago

      I seen a lot of people have this particular question and the question that I have for them is what isn’t free will?

      On the religious side you’ve got the people who are saying God knows everything so he already knows what you’re going to do. On the science side you’ve got all humans are just chemicals in a hot dog casing.

      My opinion is, either which way you look at it you are free to choose what you want to do.

      Just because somebody can make you question the freedom of your choices does not mean that your choices are not born of free will.

      • papalonian@lemmy.world
        1·
        14 days ago

        Here’s my take, and you can do with it as you will.

        We don’t have free will, how could we? We are, as you said, chemicals in a hot dog casing. When I see something I want to eat, it’s because chemicals tell me I’m hungry and it will provide sustenance. When I do something that I enjoy, and want to pursue, my brain is receiving chemicals that it enjoys, and tells me to continue doing actions that produce said chemicals. I can choose to do these things or not, but my choice in and of itself is determined by… more chemicals.

        But why does it matter, if those chemicals also tell “me” that “me” is the one in charge?

        It’s like the cave/ shadow metaphor (that I will poorly paraphrase and misuse); hold a chair in front of a candle, show me the shadow, call it a “table” for my entire life, and the first time I see a chair I will say, “so this is what a table looks like!” It doesn’t matter that it’s actually a chair, just like it doesn’t matter if I actually am making my choices. My reality (and your reality) is what I perceive and accept, and nothing more. Logically, I understand that when presented the choice between A and B, my body and the chemicals composing it are the ones “making” the decision, and I’m just acting it out. I get that. But if someone says, “do you want really want to watch The Lord of the Rings again?” I already know that the world has changed, because I feel it in the water, feel it in the earth, and smell it in the air.

        And that’s my choice, chemicals be damned.

        • bizarroland@fedia.io
          1·
          14 days ago

          I mean, if you were mindless and hungry you would eat the first food that came your way.

          But you are not mindless and so you choose whether to eat a sandwich or a burger or a pizza and what kind of sandwich or burger or pizza it is.

          You can choose to abstain from eating to lose weight or for religious purposes.

          There is a part of you that has choice and control.

          And even if that is a bioelectric chemical process, it’s not always in charge, there is no one standing piece of you that is always entirely completely in control.

          But there is always an observer. A sense of self.

          And depending on the chemicals in your brain that observer will make different choices either positively or negatively for you as an entity.

          You can look at it and say it is just chemical reactions but who is to say that Free Will is not a chemical reaction?

          What if there are literal chemicals in your brain that can undergo their chemical processes in different ways based on the choices you make?

          Would not that overall function be free will?

    • Akasazh@feddit.nl
      3·
      15 days ago

      There’s this nice dialog that’s written by logician and taoist Raymund Smullyan that is about a man asking god to abscond him off free will. I will not spoil the plot but it has some great turns and offers insights on the absurdities and (im) possibilities of the desire not to have free will (and of talking to god).

      It’s a long read, mind you but it may give you more insight on what you want to know about.

      https://www.mit.edu/people/dpolicar/writing/prose/text/godTaoist.html