I’m asking as I’m trying to understand empathy and whether it’s normal to get so invested in fake characters, I mean it’s probably a testament to the writers but I overthink… a lot.

This question was bright on as I’ve been catching up on The Blacklist and at lunch today watching Season 8 Episode name “Anne “ and it wrecked me.

Tap for spoiler

Basically the main character Red has to live a guarded life and for once he let it form and got close to Anne and you could tell shit was going to go downhill and it destroyed me when you think about it from his or her perspective.

For reference I’m 41 year old dude, not that it matters.

Edit: Bedtime for me but back tomorrow to reply to all.

Edit 2: I’ve got 41 comments to respond to. Currently working but I’ll be back y’all.

  • Rob T Firefly@lemmy.world
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    1 minute ago

    Yep. I’m a reasonably masculine-presenting guy and most good movies or shows will make me tear up at some point, it’s a standard occurrence if the story has grabbed me in any satisfying way and brought me on the resulting emotional highs and/or lows.

    We joke around about it in my household because my wife is a mostly femme-presenting woman, but she generally doesn’t tear up at films or shows while I’m next to her having what old stereotypes would say is the girly reaction. It’s not that she isn’t experiencing the story as fully or anything, she can be enjoying something just as much as I and the emotional reaction just affects us differently because (gasp!) we’re two different people.

  • UniversalBasicJustice@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 hours ago

    I cried reading about Opportunity. Not losing one or the lack thereof.

    The Mars Rover.

    Also the Wikipedia article on the Miracle on the Hudson. No I haven’t seen the Tom Hanks movie nor do I plan to unless I really need an ugly cry.

  • Monzcarro@feddit.uk
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    5 hours ago

    Yup, all the time. To give an example, yesterday I watched DC League of Super Pets with my child and cried quite a lot at one bit (if you’ve seen it, you probably know which bit). It’s a solid movie overall too - great voice cast.

    It’s not unusual for me to cry when reading or listening to the news.

    I’m 41 too, but a woman.

  • embed_me@programming.dev
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    5 hours ago

    I don’t usually cry during movies. But sometimes later when I’m thinking about it I let out a tear or two. Also I cried during a voyager documentary

  • daggermoon@lemmy.world
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    6 hours ago

    Me, alot actually. If your movie made me feel nothing it probably sucked. If it actually managed to make me cry it’s probably a pretty good movie.

  • ThisIsNotHim@sopuli.xyz
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    9 hours ago

    I tear up at most movies. It’s not a sad movie, but Everything Everywhere All at Once holds the current record for most cries.

    Generally if a movie doesn’t make me tear up at least once that’s a bad sign. At the same time I don’t gravitate towards tearjerkers, they can feel emotionally manipulative and heavy handed.

    I almost never cry for TV shows or books.

  • nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    9 hours ago

    if i get triggered i will have a full body cry that lasts an hour and ill just be sitting there in the seat after the lights come on soaked in tears unable to move it’s really embarrassing thanks pixar you fucking asshole

  • OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml
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    10 hours ago

    Anyone here watch K Dramas? Crash Landing on You emotionally broke me. I knew they couldn’t keep portraying North Korea as good, but they didn’t have to do all that…

  • Juvyn00b@lemmy.world
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    16 hours ago

    The older I get, the more I don’t give a fuck and just let go. Interstellar - when Cooper is watching messages from his son… Gets me every damn time.

  • Binturong@lemmy.ca
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    19 hours ago

    Hey fellow 41 year old dude, I also cry at this stuff. It seems especially pronounced when rewatching nostalgic productions with well written characters and conflict (I will not apologize for crying all the time during Avatar the last Airbender, as an adult man). No, I do not know what this means in regard to healthy emotional processing, it just is what it is. Mind you I also get unjustifiably angry or emotional in other contexts when I feel connected to the fate of a character and they experience injustice. So this might be a general marker for some level of empathy or maybe just emotional mimicry. Thanks for posting, I think this is something people should be okay talking about more.

    Edit: I wanted to add this also occurs in other mediums, like video games. Cyberpunk 2077 was like a revolution in awareness for me, but largely because I experience DID to a degree in my life, and it really flipped the table of my understanding of myself seeing what I experience through the eyes of others.

  • gamer@lemm.ee
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    15 hours ago

    The only movie that legit made me cry was Seven Pounds with Will Smith. I only saw it once, and I tried real goddamn hard to suppress the tears, but a few leaked out. Luckily, none of the people I watched it with noticed, so my masculinity remained in-tact.

    I’m asking as I’m trying to understand empathy and whether it’s normal to get so invested in fake characters,

    Fuck yeah it is. It’s a beautiful thing to be so moved by something that it brings you to tears (especially art). It’s what makes us human: we’re not just mindless beasts trying to eat and fuck, we’re experiencing life to its fullest.

  • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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    23 hours ago

    And books.

    If the story and characters are well written and/or acted well enough to pull you in to the story you can certainly feel empathy and other feelings vicariously.

    There is plenty of entertainment that does not pull the viewer/reader in, and you don’t particularly get “involved” with them.

    I’d be curious what the line is for most people, what draws them in to a story emotionally to make that investment in a fictional character.

  • throwawayacc0430@sh.itjust.works
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    24 hours ago

    My memory sucks so can’t remember much, but:

    The Hunger Games (1) when

    Major Spoilers btw

    Rue died and Katniss was honoring her, and did the District 12 salute and the scene cuts to District 11 start doing it, then the whole riot scene and it just reminds me of so much of the injustice and tyranny of the world… I just can’t stop crying. I wished we have some of the District 12 - District 11 Solidarity IRL.

    I actually remember when, as a kid, I rarely cried about fictional stories, or something even bad events IRL.

    But once I go through the existential crisis at 18, I started to actually feel stories, like actually feeling it. I ser deaths, injustice, and tyranny. The “veil of innocence”, as I call it, completely shattered. The world isn’t beautiful, its hell, its horror.

    Its actually when you get older, you understand the stories being told.

    • 5too@lemmy.world
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      21 hours ago

      I feel like there’s a term for it, but I can’t recall it now - it seems like after you have kids, emotional impacts in media can also start to hit a lot harder. I’m not sure if there’s some empathetic response that tends to get strengthened or what, but my wife and I both have things we either can’t watch anymore or don’t process the same way. Like, I decided to start rewatching Star Trek: DS9 a few years ago (a year or two into fatherhood) and got wrecked by the scenes in the first episode where the captain relives losing his wife.