And does the SF ever go away?
Sounds like a categorically terrible idea. Is there any ackshuall proof having 1 orgasm per day (regardless of the outlet or method) is harmful in any measurable/quantifiable way besides reducing desperation for sex?
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I sincerely dont and cant understand no-fap outside of an addiction 12-steps/abstinence style vantage point.
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Like, i dont get how they (presumuably) view having an orgasm-via-penis-in-vagina everyday as truly and biologically distinct from everyday orgasm-via-masturbation. I dont think your body truly knows the difference in a mechanical sense.
Mechanical isn’t the only part being played. There’s hormones too. I’m positive there’s differences there depending on alone or with someone. Whether or not that has any health implications I’ve no idea.
You get it!
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Having never looked into it, beyond what I come across occasionally on sites like this, I always assumed the idea was that being desperate for “relief” somehow made them more attractive to women, hormonally, or made them more “alpha”? Somehow.
Really stupid shit that kids fall for, I guess.
being desperate for “relief” somehow made them more attractive to women
We all know that the thing women are most attracted to is desperation. /s
being desperate for “relief” somehow makes men more attractive to women, hormonally
It’s true!
I’ve also seen it recommended for breaking “death grip” habits.
Yeah it would basically be an anti addiction approach for me. Addiction runs in my family and we get addicted to everything remotely pleasurable. So I’ve spent my whole life saying no to alcohol & drugs & cigarettes, and since I cant find a suitable companion I have to say no to orgasms too 🤷🏼♀️ For me it feels empowering.
Well I’m a woman and I’ve talked to some men too who agree that when we masturbate it tends to make us turn socially inward & diminishes our drive to reach out to other people.
Whereas sexual frustration compels us to go out into the world with a sense of hunger & ambition, seeking social interaction & activities.
It’s the lifestyle I’ve chosen because after years of suffering all aspects of this mortal hell we call life, I’d rather feel paragraph 2 than paragraph 1.
This view seems, to me, to be really sex-focused in kind of a creepy way that … if you ask me, might have something to do with denying basic urges.
You can go out into the world looking for connections that are not sexual.
Without sexual release we’re a bit voracious & on edge but also at peak creativity & ambition; driving us to go out in the world and get shit done. Invent things. Create things. Meet new people with no ulterior motives, already living a wholesome life, and that’s how we can meet people the real way without our hands constantly down our own pants.
What evidence are you basing the idea that your drive comes from your libido? There are a lot of people out there with low or no libidos who have accomplished a ton.
Why are you focusing on libido as the source of creativity to the exclusion of a lot of other potential drivers?
This is what I am saying: the focus seems odd and creepy without lots of evidence for your reasoning.
It’s my own subjective experience. Masturbating is effortless immediate gratification that turns me into a reclusive hermit.
But every time I abstain for a month or so, I become a real person who participates in life & wants to connect with people. *
The difference is undeniable.
I’m not telling you what to do and I’m not telling anyone else in the world what I think they should do. I’m telling you my own subjective experience and my own choice.
*Yesterday I had enough courage to approach a super hot guy doing pushups on the beach 🥰 I had seen him there before doing yoga in the same place a couple weeks earlier & fell instantly in love because I’m a yoga girl too so when I saw him again yesterday my inner fires were finally burning at normal level, no shyness or low self-esteem yesterday for a change 😄 We chit-chatted, he likes me 💕
I think maybe you should think through why you feel that way, though. Surely you could decide to go out and be social because you would like to make new friends or be entertained. You’re here, writing out your thoughts, so you’re able to reflect and decide on actions.
I am older, and have not found any of that to be true. As a lady, more makes more; more sex makes sex feel better and it’s easier to get off, and sexual frustration does not make me creative at all, just distracted and frustrated.
There is also physical benefit to sex for older women, I don’t know if it’s the same for younger, but certainly after menopause sex prevents vaginal atrophy and prolapse of internal organs, it’s sort of a use it or lose it situation. Penetration and orgasms are good for muscle tone, apparently. Beyond the obvious benefits of pleasure and relationship building.
I’m a man so maybe it’s different but having tried both, that certainly isn’t the case for me. Without sexual release I just want to cum. It doesn’t inspire me to do anything else that won’t move me towards that goal. Maybe if masturbation were impossible it would be a different story but as it stands the only purpose being frustrated serves is to distract me from non-sexual tasks. Being lonely on the other hand does inspire me to go out and do things and maintain relationships but it’s not for sex. If I’m frustrated in that regard I’d rather just stay home and jerk off. That’s a sure thing rather than the incredibly low chance I’ll meet someone that wants to fuck me right away.
It would seem like the source of this unhealthy worldview probably isn’t the masturbation. But if nofap honestly (honestly) helps you, then knock yourself out.
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I just saw several posts the last 2 days of a study that showed that if you don’t cum enough, your sperm becomes a bunch of dumb dumbs. Yes, I used scientific lingo for that, I’m sorry.
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Qu’est-ce que c’est ?
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It’s French. It means “What is this?”
“it is what it is”? (I don’t know latin.)
That isn’t what it is.
It’s a little odd calling them a “mate” in this context. There’s nothing wrong with masterbation. If you think porn is had and don’t wanna watch it, that’s fine, but genuinely there is absolutely nothing wrong with masterbation. I think a lot of people take folks’ negative feelings about porn and twist them into negative feelings about self pleasure and try to get people to believe that living some “pure” life where you don’t touch yourself is inherently better than the alternative or something. It’s really not.
Sex is a big part of life. There’s no reason you can’t do it alone. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t do it alone. Go enjoy yourself. Have some me time. It’s not something to feel guilty about.
Tell that to the religious that are being taught every day that they’ll go to hell for touching their peepee because God always watches them, always judges them
I’d be happy to. I believe they’re being lied to. I was brought up in that same puritanical culture. Leaving the church and religion were the most freeing things of my life.
But even apart from that, if you believe that lust is a sin and/or that pornography is morally wrong, you can still masterbate without that being a part of it. That’s sort of what I was trying to get at without being so direct, as I don’t know if OP is religious or what their beliefs are. Too many people think that looking at porn and masturbating are the same thing. You can look at porn without touching yourself. You can touch yourself without looking at porn. You can even touch yourself without imagining yourself having sex with someone. I have male body parts, and generally “fap” implies male parts, so I sort of assume OP has the same parts as me. It is a very common experience, especially when younger, that any sort of physical stimulation down there results in an erection. If you get an erection because you crossed your legs in tight pants, did you lust? No. Of course not. If you get an erection because you intentionally touch yourself in a way you find pleasurable, have you lusted? I say no, and I feel pretty strongly about that. How is it different than rubbing your shoulders to give yourself some relief if you’re tense? It’s another physical stimulation that feels good.
desperate/suffering people are easier to control, i assume that is the main reason for this kind of stuff in religion especially since it has no basis in the original message.
The “original message” was also only about control, like every other religion out there
no, i think its about there being something better than all… * this *. And how to be better and maybe get out of here after you die. Though I think it servers only as a general guide and you are supposed to find your own way.
Then at some point priests noticed how they can use religion to their own ends and they started twisting it and inventing more stuff and now here we are.
Your balls will explode!
I’m a woman.
In that case, your balls probably won’t explode then.
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That’s fatal.
I have a friend who was in that situation. After a while he just started jerking it again. Not watching so much porn and not jerking it every day is probably good for you, but going no fap is just gonna give you wet dreams to clean up and won’t actually solve any problems.
The whole “rarely find a mate” thing is first of all a really weird phrasing and secondly is a solvable problem. That manosphere crap is a learned helplessness grift. Lower your standards a bit, get some hobbies, go socialize. As long as you respect people, you’ll find plenty of people willing to give you a chance.
I’m in it, last relationship was 17 years or so ago
I mean it ain’t all bad. So long as you don’t mind the actual loneliness, the physical touch gets easy to forget.
But I dunno if I’d recommend this to anyone tbh
Oh edit because I didn’t address your question. No it doesn’t go away, but it gets easier to ignore over time. Also I’m on 1500mg oh lithium so that may impact things.
I did it for a little over a month once just to see what it was like. There weren’t really any effects beyond just being horny all the time. It was basically like being a teenager in high school again. Other than that nothing changed. I didn’t experience any of the benefits you see people talking about. I probably had more trouble focusing on work but that’s hard to tell because that’s always been a problem.
the “benefits” are mostly people with addictions losing their executive disfunctions. re-realizing you can just…do things you want to do is powerful experience
Personally I find being horny incredibly distracting. It’s so hard to focus on anything and makes interacting with people you could theoretically “mate” with much more difficult because my mind is constantly preoccupied with “would. I wonder if they’d be interested.” Really annoying.
Yeah I’m the same way. I have a much easier time interacting with women if I keep the edge off.
I don’t understand the idea of not fapping.
Most religions require sacrifice of something considered normal, delicious or maiming of the body. Like not reading a certain type of meat, not drinking alcohol or cutting ones foreskin.
It’s s test of dedication which, if embraced, will bond one to the cult. Not masturbating can be seen in a similar way. It’s just asceticism rebranded.
Using the term “NoFap” in the title is a bit like putting “AI” in there - it pretty much guarantees zero productive conversation in the comments and instead acts as a bug light for certain people to just chime in with their personal views on that one thing.
I don’t even bother writing a response to the actual question because I don’t want to spend the rest of the day defending views I don’t even hold.
One of the side effects is compulsive posting on 4chan /pol
I can only guess anger, depression and extreme irritability. Especially in such a sexually charged culture.
you can never make art again
You ll just be alot more horny and you will have more sexual daydreams. The rest normalizes, but keep in mind sex is healthy for the body in general.
I’ll first state that I am NOT the normal outcome but I think it might be interesting for others to see my situation.
I am transfem (male-to-female) and am on Estrogen injections and Progesterone pills. I’m not on any testosterone blockers as my natural testosterone production is literally 1/10th the average male testosterone levels (56 without HRT, 18 on HRT. Minimum acceptable level is ≥250). I am also on antidepressants, and 2 anti anxiety medications. All of these combine to me having essentially no labido at all.
I would call myself asexual but if I find a partner I might want to do it sometimes, but idk since I’ve never had a partner because I really don’t have any natural drive to get one like others do 😅
I only had 1 crush throughout my entire teenage years, but on HRT I am falling for people a LOT more now lolOn estrogen you don’t get ‘morning wood’ like mens bodies do, which is a natural thing your body does to prevent the damage/shrinking to tissue in the penis. So instead you have to manually get an erection at least once a week, but this is difficult for me as I have no drive to. I have casually gone 2.5 weeks without doing it just because I really didn’t want to, and have experienced the repercussions of it.
I would say there’s some really slight tension for the first week but then absolutely nothing 🤷♀️
I feel like this meme portrays my attraction type more than anything sexual
Thank you for sharing your experience. It seems based on your numbers and pre-transition experience, you were always genetically meant to be a woman, low testosterone & low libido just like so many of us!
That cartoon, yeah whenever I’m in a relationship I always end up feeling like the girl in pink. I’m so clingy & obsessed. But when I’m alone I’m stronger getting shit done & being independent & responsible, because there’s no other choice, gotta survive, but so lonely.
Benefits: You can take all the meds with sexual side effects (e.g. most anti-depressants) which is actually a significant reason people ultimately stop taking them, and folks with testicles retain all their spermidine which low n RCTs have shown early evidence for autophagy-based longevity.
