It all started with a tweet about a couch. Within hours of Donald Trump announcing the Ohio senator JD Vance as his running mate in the presidential race, a rather lurid accusation cropped up on social media.
The user of a since-deleted X account wrote last month, “can’t say for sure but he might be the first vp pick to have admitted in a ny times bestseller to fucking an inside-out latex glove shoved between two couch cushions (vance, hillbilly elegy, pp. 179-181).”
The fake page citation from Vance’s bestselling memoir Hillbilly Elegy lent credibility to what turned out to be a baseless claim, as detailed in a now-removed fact check from the Associated Press. Soon, the internet was awash in memes mocking Vance’s relationship with various pieces of furniture. “I did not have sectional relations,” one X user joked, paraphrasing Bill Clinton’s infamous quote about his extramarital affair. Another user added: “Who hasn’t been excited by the thrill of the chaise?”
Even Kamala Harris’s newly launched presidential campaign appeared to get in on the fun, tweeting: “JD Vance does not couch his hatred for women.”
Wait so the couch fucking thing was bullshit? It’s just so… specific. Talk about an impressive shitpost.
I mean, we can’t definitively say it didn’t happen.
That is almost certainly why the AP fact check was taken down. While it was true that the alleged passage was not in the book as claimed, there is no proof that Vance did not fuck a piece of furniture.
We can only really say for sure that he didn’t write about it in his book. But have we checked everything he ever wrote?
Has he ever specifically stated that he has not had sectional relations?
No, but he did state that his hardwood sofa is an inanimate object and thus consent is not something he’d have to worry about
It was always bs, but people on the Internet like spreading lies. I saw some politician go on MSNBC and she brought it up too. It’s embarrassing if she believed it and spread it.
It’s only proper: Faux had been hyping ‘immigrant crime’ and every Trump positive, Biden negative bullshit they can. Spreading bullshit & lies? Republican marching orders. Pogram against Democracy. Putin smiles.
Wait until you find the dolphin thing
Yeah. Some random dude tweeted it and it got passed around. The original tweet was deleted because they realized it was getting taken seriously.
The account posted the Arthur go in the Internet and tell lies meme like 10 minutes after, but the Internet had a meme, and the Internet wanted to keep that meme.
Bullshit that he did not get consent from the couch.
How old was that couch anyway?
That’s how culture jamming works. Talk about shot that don’t matter just LEAVE NESTLÉ ALONE
If Trump kicks Vance off the ticket, I’d be interested to see who at this point would be willing to throw in with him. You have to think that list is even shorter now than it was a month ago
Yeah, dropping this VP after a such a short time, and trying to have his previous one killed, makes you wonder who would want the job.
Ted Cruz? He seems enough like Grima Wormtongue to do it.
There’s plenty of people that want the job. Try to have his previous one killed? When did this happen? You have a source?
Garbage…Three people said? After they say someone told them? Sounds a lot like girl saying Trump lunged for the steering wheel in the presidential limo, lol.
There were gallows and chanting of “hang Mike pence’ when he decided to follow his station’s duty and not allow theft of a rightful election. There’s multiple pieces of footage from 1/6/21 that shows this.
So, how does people chanting that mean that Trump tried to have him killed???
And? Like I told that person, you’re pointing to a hearsay article where three people say that another person told them that he seemed to support the idea. It’s the same type of story the girl gave about Trump lunging at the Secret Service inside the Presidential limo, which we know to be false now. So I assume that’s what you’re calling proof?
You have a serious case of confirmation bias, only believing what you wanna believe when it suits you. Your history has plenty to back that assessment … https://reddthat.com/post/21896576
Jan. 6.
Ya dumb
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There’s plenty of crazy for him to pick from. Vance was probably the least crazy of the crazy.
What a basket of deplorables.
He still has time to go with the puppy murderer.
Tim Scott would do so many terrible things to take that spot. Horrible, degrading things.
Beyond anything else, I think we can agree that’s a heck of a headline. British press style is extremely annoying, but every now and then something clicks and makes you wonder if it’s all worthy (it isn’t).
You just can’t appreciate a good pun or 19,000 a day 😛
I strongly recommend the book The Truth by Terry Pratchett. He does a send up of the press in general and there are so many puns. Like this gem:
Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler, Ankh-Morpork’s most enterprisingly unsuccessful businessman, peered at William over the top of his portable sausage-cooking tray. Snowflakes hissed in the congealing fat.
William sighed. ‘You’re out late, Mr Dibbler,’ he said politely.
‘Ah, Mr Word. Times is hard in the hot sausage trade,’ said Dibbler.
‘Can’t make both ends meat, eh?’ said William. He couldn’t have stopped himself for a hundred dollars and a shipload of figs.
He just did an interview with Oprah this weekend
Oprah’s expression is one that says, “oh god. No. Not this couch too!”
Trump has no problem dropping people when they aren’t doing him any favors. He sure did as president. I wouldn’t be shocked if he dropped Vance… but I also don’t think it will help him if he does it no matter who else he picks.
The couch thing might be fiction, but he really did google dolphin porn (who cares about his purported reason).
Lmao, what context did they provide for the dolphin porn search? I mean, I know why I do it, I just wondered what reason they gave.
He reposted it saying “the Internet was a mistake”, probably trying to pass it off as something that just came up when he was scrolling. Think, right wingers ranting about the immorality of big tech, etc. But the screenshot shows he searched for it.
Don’t forget the burned monkey testacles
You always shake the pan while braizing them in butter.
Purpoised reason?
(purporpoise reasons)
How the actual fuck am I being served an ad for a couch in this thread!?
Is that in an app or the browser?
I don’t see any ads on Voyager for iOS.
I use sync on Android, ad supported and that’s cool with me. Dev needs to eat and I do too
Sure, but do you need some sweet sweet couch in your life? Or if you prefer love handles, perhaps an armchair?
Given how much press the sofa is taking, I would not be surprised if Trump ditches Vance for the sofa.
Give it time. Soon enough he’ll hire a reputation management company, shave his beard, show up for Dancing on the Stars, then SNL will put him in a sketch as Waluigi.
He can go to the same bottomless pit fat orange is headed for
Sofa king, we Todd did.
Not too fast. Loses meaning.
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Eye yam sofa king hard right now. I mean, it’s called a “love seat” right?
“You can have a vice-president that is outstanding in every way, and I think JD is, I think all of them would have been, but you’re not voting that way. You’re voting for the president. You’re voting for me.”
As the oldest presidential candidate in American history, I think it’s entirely reasonable to consider the non-trivial chance that his second may need to step in at some point.
I would wager that couch fucker already has a plan to use the 25th amendment.
I don’t think you can really blame the sofa for being bad at sex. It is an inanimate object.
Doesn’t that mean the sofa also can’t give consent?
This would be a perfect thing for Tucker Carlson to just ask questions about. If he wasn’t a huge piece of shit
