She gained some weight but she is not fat at all!
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“I don’t think so but if you want us to eat healthier and get more exercise I’m game”
He said in his post she has put on weight. Why lie when there are many other not lying answers that are much better?
She was underweight before because she hardly ate anything. She’s way better now. But some people comment on her change of weight because they compare it to how she was before.
When she was under weight, just tell her she looks a lot healtier then she did and most importantly that you like her no matter what.
With humans it’s just like with other animals, you shouldn’t be able to see the ribs, you need to be able to feel them, just. (You can go hunt for them and tickle her to prove it ;) )
It´s a trap. She seems to suffer from an eating disorder, so if you directly respond to the statement, you can only lose. No matter what you say she will find a way to turn it around. Instead ignore the “I am fat” part and immediately steer away from the topic. Try something like:
I’m sorry, it looks like this is freaking you out. You know it’s not useful to talk about it, right? So, let’s do something to change the mood. Shall we (insert activity you both enjoy) instead?
I wish you both all the best!
Has gained weight is different than is fat.
She could have gone from 97lbs to 98lbs. Gained weight, but not fat.
Yup, I have to make this point to my wife every time she says it. BDD is a bitch.
Wow. Rhetoric is important. You have to convince people. Sometimes that’s doing it with them.
It’s not lying. Fat and overweight mean different things in this context. Fat is a pejorative word, carrying a negative connotation. Overweight is a statement of fact
The gf isn’t saying, “I’m fat,” as an acknowledgement of her weight being over the recommended bmi, she’s actually saying, “I’ve gained weight, and I feel ugly and I’m concerned you won’t be attracted to me anymore.”
Might as well ask Lemmy how to pass the Kobayashi Maru test, while you’re at it.
Might be a tricky example. The answer to that according to a certain cadet is to cheat. Not sure gf would appreciate that.
I always liked Calhoun’s solution. Obliterate the Maru. It’s either a trap or it’s not. If it is, you don’t want to leave it there for someone else to fall for. If it’s not, you don’t want to leave it there to cause a diplomatic incident, and fiery plasma death is probably better than whatever the Klingons / Romulans would do to the crew.
Of course, I don’t recommended launching a full spread of photon torpedoes at your gf.
The Calhoun solution? Throw a bald cancerous kid in the simulator?
If done successfully she’ll never know
Understand the deeper meaning of the situation and what they are actually looking for?
You know what, other poster that recommendations cheating may be easier.
Edit: or is this a helplessness, try anyway deal??
“You callin my girl fat you piece of shit?!”
i love this comment. it is extremely funny. /gen
What do you expect? Your mom was fat and as you grow older you’re becoming her.
This kills the man
If you’re still alive at that point, and want that to change, start talking about her younger sister.
#nailedit
nail edit
na i led it
How to get a divorce with one easy step!
“Is that what we’re gonna do today, we gonna fight?”
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Thank you for a serious answer. I would love it if a man did this for me after I expressed dislike about my appearance.
“Have you tried eating less than a metric fuckton of junk at every meal, ya goddamn ham planet?!”
That’ll work.
You have to rebuke her. For real. Go like this:
" Don’t you dare! I love this lovely girl here. Don’t you dare badmouth her or you’ll have to deal with me! "
(and not a word about fat or weight or width or any outside descriptions, because this is only about self deprecation)
You can’t win this one.
It’s over OP, she has the high ground.
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Yup, whatever you say is going to backfire, make sure you got an exit plan :)
“Phew! I thought you were pregnant.”
“Even if you have gained weight you still look beautiful. If you feel you need to lose weight let me know if there is anything I can do to help.”
Very thin ice
Even if you have gained weight
You already lost by the time you get to that part of the sentence.
“I know a trap when I see one”
A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.
“I want you to be happy with your body, if you need me to reassure you about how attractive you are I can, or if you want me to support you with changing your weight I can. I love you and your body”
At least that’s basically where I go as a woman with a healthy weight but body image issues for not being underweight and a wife who gained a lot of weight over the pandemic and a girlfriend who is in the “needs to lose weight for her health” range.
My partner flat asked if I still find her as attractive as I used to. After some thought I said the following, “I don’t think that’s fair. You’re asking me to rate someone I care about so much. I don’t want to do that. I love you and just want to be there for you, with you.”
Tbh, I don’t know what the right answer might be for others. I’m not that wise. All I know for certain is how I feel and hoped that was enough. It was, though I am sad that I can’t take her self-esteem and tear away those damn chains that hold it back from growing.
A classic non-answer answer. You will do well with women.
That’s what I say as well and not just to those sort of questions.
‘I’m not gonna answer that since there’s no upside to it regardless of what I say.’
It’s my go to for unfair questions/questions my opinion doesn’t matter in.
