That’s it
Yes. I’m a guy, and I would love to get a girl’s take on this.
Do you think Fermi’s “Great Filter” is not necessarily that a civilization destroys itself, but that it discovers a way to destroy the Universe?
Like, maybe the fabric of our reality is more fragile than we realize, and the reason we don’t see “aliens” is that the universe doesn’t get old enough for intelligent life to meet.
Of course, this assumes we are in a statistically “average” Universe, since presumably there could be a Universe in which intelligent life co-evolves within the same solar system.
Personally, I think you’re really close to the answer but with an important distinction. The great filter is an hyper aggressive species that does not want to deal with a potential cold war with a different species with technology as advanced as their own. They already launched their doomsday armageddon weapon at us after detecting our existence, probably from something like our farthest satille, Voyager 1.
It could take generations for the bomb heading to our sun or stealth asteroid heading directly for us to actually connect. But it’s arguably in their best interest not to even chance us becoming militarily on par with them.
Statistically there is alien life out there somewhere, and whichever one got to interplanetary weapons first would have everything to lose by allowing an equal to exist.
My question for you is, why do you want a female perspective on this? Idk, doesn’t seem like something that gender would effect.
No offense intended, but do you identify as male? I can’t even be having this conversation if you do.
😂
I do not. Heck, the thread is about asking the other sex, I wouldn’t have answered if I was a dude.
Phew okay. In that case, I do agree that a hyper-aggressive species could be the Filter, though it’s worth noting that our radio signals have actually reached further than our furthest probe, so I would go off that when doing round-trip destruction calculations. I love Mass Effect’s take on this idea (though I haven’t played 3).
As for why I asked women: Mostly because I thought the non-sequitur was funny.
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You mean like what if species at a certain level of development start fucking around with zero point energy and trigger false vacuum decay?
Actually it’s entirely possible it’s already happened. There are lots of galaxies so far away their light will never reach us if it’s emitted now, and vacuum decay travels at the speed of light AFAIK
Nonbinary btw
That’s exactly what I mean. Like, even if a civilization set out at near-light speed a long time before triggering a vacuum decay, the decay would just catch up to them and wipe them out before they could reach us. It’s a theory absolutely rife with holes, but it’s an interesting possibility.
I’ll gladly accept nonbinary!
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I believe that science, math, are more inextricably linked to philosophy than people tend to think.
While my idea is particularly half-cocked, the Great Filter theory is an important question for us as a species to answer. If evidence ever came to light that there is some challenge awaiting us that could wipe out our species, it would behoove us to at least be aware that such a challenge exists - even without necessarily knowing any specifics.
I gotta admit, I really wanted to like 3BP on Netflix, but imo they added way too much “personal drama”. It’s like they intended to sprinkle it on and the lid came off the container lol. It was worth it just to see the ship though.
Fyi, math and science is philosophy. Science is how philosophy started to actually get answers to the questions it was asking(the scientific method) and math is one of the languages it did it through. The Cult of Pythagoras was a group that believed all answers could be found through numbers and math.
Philosophy helped birth both of those fields.
Agreed. I was never a “math kid”, so when I got to university, I was very surprised that a large part of what I learned in my math courses was actually philosophy.
That shift in paradigm instantly made me interested in math, weirdly enough. Turns out I love math, I’m just not a fan of numbers, haha.
Interesting thought, but there is no evidence for this, right?
No, just theories, the great filter being one of them.
If you’re interested, here’s an article that breaks down the “Great Filter” theory pretty well imo:
https://www.astronomy.com/science/the-great-filter-a-possible-solution-to-the-fermi-paradox/
Male here. Is it true that sometimes farts unexpectedly head north and get lost in the caverns of the bubblegum forest?
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Farts are also varied for guys, I suppose depending on diet. But yeah, the hot ones are equal parts disturbing and satisfying.
Yes, this is true.
Damn. My condolences.
What did you think the Willy Wonka factory was based on? That liquid brown river wasn’t chocolate…
I’ve heard these referred to as “exiting through the gift shop”
Bubblegum forest
This cracked me up
Agree with sparkles.
TIL
Eyup
Is there any way for a man to compliment a woman in public without it coming across as weird, or an attempt to hit on her?
Or should I just not do that in general?I’ve always been told the best thing to do is stick to complimenting things that are their choices.
Not great: That outfit makes you look good!
It’s you coming off as being interested in their physical appearance, not the outfit.
Better: That’s an awesome T-shirt! Where did you find that?
It’s you thinking they picked out something cool or stylish and you like their taste in outfits. You’re putting the attention on something they did, not anything about them appearance-wise.
Especially if they don’t know you, odds are they have no desire to hear a stranger’s opinion on their looks. That’s too personal. But a stranger agreeing with their decision on something like buying something cool generally isn’t.
Of course, some people are more or less open to any conversation with someone they don’t know, so if you still get ignored or get looked at like a creep, you don’t know their background and you respect that and don’t persist.
A good rule to go by is if you’re a guy, think of a guy coming up to you and saying the same thing or you saying what you’re going to say to another guy. If you wouldn’t tell another bro that he looks good wearing that, maybe don’t do that to a girl. If you see a guy wearing a band shirt of a group you like though, you’d probably be ok saying “whoa, I love that band too!” or you’d be cool with some random dude telling you the same.
You shouldn’t be afraid to talk to people, but you should always be respectful and keep in mind how well you know them and keep conversation at that level of appropriateness.
In addition to this, I’ve heard people say to do ‘drive by compliments’. If you’re not trying to start up a conversation or don’t want the person to worry about a conversation, you can drop the compliment right as you’re about to leave the situation. It has its downsides as well
This has been my strategy. I like to compliment people because I can remember the few times it’s happened to me, but I’m not trying to creep anyone out. Mostly stuff like “awesome shirt!” or “hey, sweet hat”. Never “nice cock, bro”. And never with the intention of starting a conversation. Mostly like passing by someone and pointing “excuse me, love the boots.”, then keep on truckin’ by.
Heh i have a couple stories.
At costco picking up hotdogs for the crew, get back to car and notice older (60+) lady with Doc Martins on (i figure shes an old hippie but doesnt really matter) so i tell her i love your big stompy boots! And because of her style i add, “you may not but i think you would love Jon Fluevog shoes” she thanks me and says she has a couple pairs and loves them but doesnt wear them every day so they last longer.
Pleasant 45 second interaction.
At a music festival in victoria bc watching a metal band called Malahat, see a younger woman wearing the same colour converse shoes im wearing standing next to me, bamd pauses and i tell her she has terrible taste is shoes as im looking down and pointing to my own shoes. She was confused for a moment then laughed loudly enough security looked my way.
Have used the shoe bit a couple times stuck in close quarters (elevators hallways transit etc) a few times not always successfully but usually it goes over well when they notice im wearing the same shoes.
Sometimes i have to explain it was just an intentionally bad joke(i do love a bad pun and a good dad joke) but rarely usually is well received. But thats literally all i intend and it usually happens in passing.
(Middleaged white guy beardo)
I wish someone would drive-by compliment me with “nice cock bro”
Sorry to look twice, but wow, nice cock, bro.
Yes I like this! When people (even random strangers) compliment an external thing and it reflects something like a mutual interest that can be pretty cool. Especially if it’s a fellow metalhead.
I approve this message.
Not really, to be honest. Unless it’s an event or venue where there is that expectation. Most of us just want to go about our business in general. I would say the first reason is just wanting to be left alone to do what we planned to do at any given time. Secondly, people don’t always take no for an answer. At best, it’s just another bother. At worst, it can be potentially scary. Hope this helps.
I love compliments! So long as it’s not an attempt to start a conversation, if you think I’m pretty say so! But please don’t expect me to say anything besides “thank you” and keep walking.
The only time I would rather a guy didn’t is if I am forced to stay in the area. If we are in a elevator or waiting room, don’t make it awkward because I’m absolutely not gonna reciprocate or set up a date with someone I don’t know.
Friday i told the teller at the bank when asked if there was anything else she could do i told her to tell her coworker(who was on the phone behind her) that she was a jerk because her shirt(blouse?) made me want lemonade (white shirt with a repeating lemon print, wasnt sure what it was and took me a bit of looking at it to figure out what it was, but had the time while the teller was processing my deposit)
Of course both of the bank people know my first name as ive been there before and i used the person’s name.
I maybe would have said something like that without having met them before, but it would really depend on the scenario and environment. Likely i would have said nothing if there wasnt enough time to explain if it wasnt received well, which isnt always the case in public.
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Your last sentence seems a bit judgemental and insulting since they specifically noted they were asking about giving a compliment when NOT trying to meet women (hit on them). But perhaps im mistaken why you included that(which will be just confusion on my end then)
Your points put into words things ive done but never really realized it or would have been able to explain.
I say this because i have complimented tattoos on more than a few occasions and i have rarely noticed an uncomfortable reaction (i judge this by the fact that they talk about the tatoo ive mentioned for longer than i spoke words).
I am fascinated by what people choose to permanently put on their body. There are often very meaningful reasons for it, but not as rarely as i would have thought it is a very quick spur of the monent decision. Most of the time this happens at a check out/til in a store.
I will typically just make a comment about the work itself, not about the placement(unless its on a spot ive been told is very painful as many people have such different experiences, “ive been told that is a tender spot for a tattoo” or some such. But its an honest question because i have been told that)
Common things that prompt me to comment are striking/vibrant colours, im curious how old the tattoo is as some colours are prone to fading badly Or very clean and clear lines, especially when they are delicate or just very thin.
I have a specific reason or curiosity which prompts me or i dont say something which i think is why i seem to be able to successfully give compliments/comments to strangers in public. But ill also compliment guys in public as well for the same reasons/circumstances and im definately not attempting to hit on or pick up guys(ide be flattered if a guy thought i was hitting on him though)
A stranger? No.
Why don’t some of you high five me when I get drunk? When I’m drunk enough, I highfive EVERYONE on the street! Never been high five rejected by a guy on the bar crawl, and some women are happy to high five…but some get defensive, and reserved, like they think my hand is poison!
Y U NO HIGH FIVE???
I’m a no touching person, and no amount of drunk will stop me from being a no touching person.
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What??? I’m not hitting people. I’m giving high fives.
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I usually run up to the guys first yelling “HIGH FIIIIIIIVE!!! HIGH FIIIIIIIIVE!!!” And then just high five them, and then their buddies, and then their ladies. Surprisingly enough, if the ratio is 1:1, thats when I get the most female rejection. If the ratio is off in either direction, thats when I get the cool women. The ones who are just as excited as I am.
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Seriously, this is like lightweight man or bear.
💯 💯 💯 💯 💯
The privilege of not having to be on guard while out around drunk people.
This exact scenario sounds threatening and like a total buzz kill. You need to understand that being out in a bar situation is a little vulnerable for women for obvious reasons, how am I supposed to know the guy coming up yelling to do a thing is safe? This could turn scary so dang quick. I get that you are just trying to be friendly and personable, but if I don’t know you then I would absolutely be taking a step back and wish you hasn’t done that.
I can’t speak for all women, but you asked. I’m not even remotely suprsied that this isn’t something other women don’t reciprocate. I think maybe you should reconsider doing this.
Lots of men, especially drunk ones, have sweaty palms
Nonbinary btw
Moms spaghetti!
Never been high five rejected by a guy
And you also never met me (I am a guy too).
My response to unexpected fist bumps, high fives and handshakes is basically a silent “Huh?” before I figure out how to respond. Awkward 4 seconds. Oh, and I also likely forgot what I was thinking of and won’t have a peace of mind until I remember it to finish the thought, but that has nothing to do with actually doing a high-five or not.I don’t want to interact with drunk people kthx.
They’re unpredictable, potentially aggressive, and I just want to avoid the entire situation.
Well…then don’t go to bars. They’re FULL of drunk people.
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You specifically said bar crawl, so better not walk downtown in the evenings, period.
I mean…yes? I’m 6’0, 270lbs and even I don’t walk downtown at night. Forget the drunks. You’ll just get straight up shot, or stabbed. All for the $37 in your wallet. They don’t care.
Better yet, women just stay home in, like, the kitchen or something.
Also yes. But not just women. Everyone. The best time I can remember was covid when the shutdowns happened. If it weren’t for all the death, and riots, that would be a fondly remembered time. Mostly because you could walk down the street without breathing in cigerette smoke, or having crackheads chase you with lead pipes. It was great walking around without people everywhere.
Then during the year I had to stay home for chemo, unable to work, financially it sucked. But it was peaceful staying home all day. That’s what every day should be!
…but also every home should have a dishwasher. I loved my time healing. I hated washing dishes. But I still loved never leaving the house.
Because idc what you are feeling, I don’t want to touch a random drunk guy. Sorry, not sorry.
People become defensive when they’ve been hurt before.
Oh, so it was you who walked past me last week downtown and was trying to get me to high-five you while shouting “HEY” at me repeatedly while I was trying to unlock my bicycle.
Uhhhhhhh…
shifty eyes
Noooooooooooo, that TOTALLY wasn’t meeeeee…but I hear that guy is awesome!
Sup, targeted at women.
Like, how do you deal with menstruation when it’s expected soon.
I mean, do you wear a tampon/pad/cup/whatever else there is in advance, just in case or…
I guess it can’t be predicted to the minute.I guess it qualifies as a weird question.
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My wife uses a panty liner when a period is coming up. For my wife at least, it usually comes on light at first and she has a chance to notice when exactly it hits by checking the liner. And once it actually starts then the tampons are used in addition to the liner.
You can’t wear tampons very long so just a pad if it’s about that time or feels that way. Typically I know to do so when I’m turning into a honey badger emotionally.
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Cool, didn’t know that about those. I haven’t tried them.
So good!! You can go to the fair or a music festival or a really long flight or whatever and not have to deal with changing whatever you use in a portapotty.
Adding to this; on top of allowing bacteria to multiply, tampons also cause micro abrasions (small tears) in the vaginal wall which allows that bacteria to enter your bloodstream much more easily. This happens under any conditions but especially if you’re using a higher absorbency than is necessary for your flow (or lack thereof). Do NOT use them for any length of time if you are not actively bleeding.
Could never use them for that reason lol, damn things were so terrifying when I was just starting out that I’d literally faint putting them in and taking them out and have serious anxiety while wearing them. Don’t know why anyone would take that risk when cups are so much safer and cheaper in the long run.
Carry tampons at all times.
When the monthly misery ends i block out the whole experience and the very existence of menstruation until next time, when i am shocked and angered that this is happening again, already!?! I’m looking forward to menopause.
Everyone is different and bodies change over time. That being said, at this point there’s a discoloration in daily discharge the day or two before Aunt Flo arrives. We Know. And period underwear is a game changer.
I like how you had to clarify that your question is aimed at women, and then proceeds to ask a question about menstration.
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I stopped tracking my period at all cause I just have a sense for it now and it was annoying when I’d forget to log a period and my tracker would tell me ridiculous things like I had a 97 day cycle or something. Plus privacy concerns. The only time it becomes inconvenient is when a doctor asks when my last period started, which usually just illicits an “I dunno, not abnormally long ago” at which point they ask me for a firm estimate and I throw out a bullshit number that will get them to move on to more pertinent discussions. I got an IUD last year so varying cycle lengths and missed periods aren’t without a reasonable explanation.
Anyways, I usually get a dull ache in my upper thigh/lower abdominal area the night before as warning. Mine start out pretty light, so a simple panty liner will keep me covered for the first handful of hours the next day. Honestly though I think I usually catch it by wiping after doing my business and seeing a trace amount of blood there, before I see any in my underwear. Although there have been other times that I just got a sense of moisture at a point, so the panty liner is a nice layer of security.
If I’m going out of the house I keep some regular pads on hand just in case the time comes to bring out the big guns. Menstrual cups are also super safe to get ahead of the flow with though (no risk of drying you out and causing micro abrasions like with tampons) so there’s been a few times that I just popped that in from the jump. My workplace also keeps emergency pads stocked in the ladies room (as a last resort, those ones are SUPER bulky for some reason, way overkill)
Yes. Why can’t those of us with a vajayjay join you guys in the Freemasons? Are you talking about us in there, or what do you do in there?
Freemasons also don’t let atheists in. Was a hard pass from me at that point. I’m not faking belief in some deist creator god just to join in their weird rituals and bridge clubs.
Same for me and the Moose.
Yeah I don’t believe in any Meese either
A Møøse once bit my sister
No idea about the Freemasons but we do talk about you on the alternate lemmy.world server port… oh wait I wasn’t supposed to mention that.
Just me?
No, but mostly you.
There are all female lodges though.
Eastern Star
I’ve heard of these but also heard they’re not made with the same sense of what they’re there for in mind, being susceptible enough to new ideas that they give a sliver of skepticism over the purity of the experience as one experienced by members of the historical rites. In fact, they and the classic groups are so disassociated with one another that the more historical groups will excommunicate more liberal versions of themselves using their likeness. Or so I’ve been let on.
Everything I’ve read about the Freemasons has been clearly written by people who hate freemasons, I mean… I don’t keep going past the obvious tell, but I’ve been inside looking out on a my own strange outsider culture so, I just can’t take haters at face value. As far as I can tell. It’s a club.
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I can not answer why, but I’ve been told I do it too.
And wake up holding my junk a lot of the time.
A lot of the times it’s definitely to reposition balls.
So sometimes not because it’s comfortable per se (and it is), but because doing it avoids possible discomfort, I guess.
Also, morning wood. What’s that about? What’s the benefit of getting an erection when we wake up? O.o
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Yeah this is an answer I’ve heard, but it’s sort of generalised.
I’d like a every detailed medical explanation on why it happens specifically when waking up.
It’s the wrong answer. Also, it’s not just when you wake up - it’s at various times during the night. The real answer is the sacral nerve: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/men-get-morning-erections-5-answers-questions
You’ll notice them in the morning most because a) you’re awake and b) you’ve had several hours for your bladder to fill, probably enough that you need to relieve it. This puts physical pressure on the sacral nerve, causing the erection. In turn, the erection closes the sphincter to the bladder more tightly because getting urine in the vagina during sex would change the pH and possibly kill sperm you have deposited/will deposit, which makes not tightening that sphincter an evolutionarily disadvantageous trait. This does make it something of a self-reinforcing cycle, though.
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Glad it helped! For what it’s worth I always thought it had to do with vasodilation, but I decided to double-check before posting 😅
Well yeah, it’s just during the night in general. Hell I’m not even awake in the mornings, lol.
This puts physical pressure on the sacral nerve, causing the erection. In turn, the erection closes the sphincter to the bladder more tightly because getting urine in the vagina during sex would change the pH and possibly kill sperm you have deposited/will deposit, which makes not tightening that sphincter an evolutionarily disadvantageous trait. This does make it something of a self-reinforcing cycle, though.
Exactly what I was asking for, thank you.
This has never made sense to me; a full bladder doesn’t give you an erection when you’re not asleep.
Says you. It sure as shit does for me, especially when I’m trying to hold it, and it’s sometimes a bastard and a half to get myself “calmed” again so I can pee.
Yeah, it’s just secure and comfortable.
Balls aren’t directly sexual, but holding onto them can be like rubbing your eyes, just kind of non-specifically pleasant.
I’ve never even heard of this before. My hands are typically near my head/shoulders when I wake up.
Sounds like you sleep with Dinosaur hands
https://www.neurosparkhealth.com/blog/what-does-sleeping-with-dinosaur-hands-mean.html
“Hey this guy doesn’t sleep with his hands on his dick, let’s call him autistic” very nuanced bro
That wasn’t supposed to be offensive “bro”. perhaps if you read it you’d see its not a “sign of autism” per se, but of neuro-atypicality. You could have read this and gone “wow, I DO sleep like that, maybe I should look into this” or “No not quite like that” but sure, you go to with the “Random internet stranger called me autistic” response.
Are you sure I too have Ethylenediaminetetraacetic acid
I think it’s common, but not universal. I sleep on my side hugging a 2nd pillow. That’s the most comfortable for me. When I wake up in a weird position, it’s on my back with arms splayed out like a gunshot victim.
Finally someone else who sleeps hugging a pillow.
I have a pillow both to the left of me and the right so I always have one to grab when I turn over.
It has nothing to do with the lack of childhood affection.
I sleep weird, on my side, top leg extended forward parallel to my torso and bent at the knee, and bottom leg straight as to follow my torso. My foot of my top leg is often positioned touching the upper part of my bottom leg as to make a triangle.
In maintaining this position I find my manhood is free, in failing this I often cup.
Reason why: its uncomfortable to have my privates sticking to my legs, or squished between my legs
Also I sleep nude might help explain the weirdness.
I’ve never consciously done this, but I have woken up many times in such a position so, I have no idea it must be some instinctual comfort position
Don’t think I sleep so, but do it after waking up for sure,
As to why - no idea.
It’s definitely comfy 😂
It’s comfortable. If it’s winter it’s also warm to keep your hands close to your body.
Using your belt/waistband is a comfortable and good way of stopping your arms dangling and flopping around while you relax/sleep.
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If you have a guy in your life that you are intimate with, try it out. Hang out on the couch cuddled up to him and give the boys a hand cuddle. You can also do him a favor and check for lumps while you are there.
You assume I sleep with pants on to put my hands down.
Naked and fancy-free’s the way to be!
My dogs jump on my balls when we get in bed at night. So I cover when laying down in bed. Habit of many years now I’m sure even when I don’t have dogs I’ll still do it for no rational reason
Ladies, I’m partially physically disabled, stuck laying down 80% of the time, and rarely ever leave a home. Still in my 30’s, but actually fit and don’t look half bad by most accounts. However, I’ll never get better physically. If there is someone out there for everyone, who is out there for me? Can you convince me to believe you, as I’m totally resigned to solitude.
I truly hope you find someone mate.
Not a woman but I’m still gonna give you the only advice I can: never ever give up as that is the only option that has a guaranteed outcome. If you are as awesome in person as you seem, I’m both rooting for you and a believer in your future.
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I met my partner online a few years ago. He is 40’s but similar situation to you. Don’t give up.
I’m a woman and this is pretty close to my entire life. After suffering a dog attack I can’t really walk anymore and it’s a struggle to do a lot of basic household tasks. I too was also pretty skeptical I would ever find a relationship, but it’s been over two years with my girlfriend and she is wonderfully supportive. We divide up house work based around what I can do and is always checking in if I’m feeling up to doing something.
All I’m saying is you can’t give up hope. Women exist who are okay with our situations, you’ll find her sooner or later. :)
What have you tried? I think with therapy to come to peace and love yourself through it and then a really honest dating profile there’s lots of hope.
Thoracic spinal damage is rare. That is the area along the rib cage. Essentially, I’m unable to go anywhere and be “normal.” I have tried to fake it at much cost to myself in the past, but I’m just not myself and come across as very awkward and unfocused. It is a mess as rather depressing to talk about the implications. I can’t blame people who do not understand the real world complications.
I refuse to believe this is a real comment, nice bait
I’m a guy.
Question: on several intimate occasions with more than a few partners I have notice partners will cup my pecks…
It makes me feel self-conscious and would like to know why some of you cup pecks? 🫠
Ha I cup my man’s pecs because they’re there. I believe it may be the same reason men like to honk ours. Honk
It took me a long time to appreciate the touch of my partner (years).
Now she could cup my belly fat and I would appreciate it. And I crave her touch.
And just like you said, in the heat of the moment, I grab whatever is there and try to make it feel good.
*Pecs, unless you’re referring to a traditional measure of pickled peppers.
Lol I like the latter more
Maybe you have unusually nice pecs.
They look like this ( . )( . )
deep inhale
Fuck yeah
As a bisexual: it’s the same reason I’d want to touch a partner’s boobs: because chest sexy
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Maybe they’re bi? Maybe they think guys like it too? I feel the same way about women who go after nipples. That does literally nothing for me.
Lots of guys do…
I have a question for the opposite gender: what’s your gender?
I don’t know what the opposite of my gender is
What’s your gender?
I’m a singularity of thought existing in the mythic plane; a mass hallucination; a self-aware story; a dialectical conversation between sociocultural influences.
Ok that means your opposite gender is a rock :)
Gay magic space rocks like in Steven Universe?
Dammit Greg, did you get another rock pregnant?
I’m actually a drop of water flowing down a river, don’t assume my state of matter
I think we can all relate to this
So fucking true, bestie!!
Well, it depends.
-
If you’re a non-binary person, we’ll eliminate the non and that’s any binary trans or cis person.
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If you are genderfluid person, then I suppose it would be gendersolid? So probably any cis person?
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If you’re an agender person, then your opposite would obviously be pangender , you can be a lack to their all.
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And if you are simply a person, well then that would be xenogender!
Or vice versa! ♥ 💕
Technically, genderfluid is more a descriptor of the rate of change of gender than of gender when you think about it :p
So really, the answer to that is an ever changing subset of people ^.^
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For the menfolks; how would you feel if your SO announced they were trans and began transition? Would you stay together? Or just become friends or something?
As a lady I don’t know how I’d feel, I think the sexual part would be a huge loss for me. I likes the G-spot orgasms.
I would become friend. But I could not stay in a relationship with my partner. I am heterosexual, so dating a man wouldn’t work for me.
Friend, if possible. My relationship preference is for women, so, I don’t see it working out.
Good question, and highly dependent. I think for the most part I’d move to being friends.
I know someone it happened to and she is still married but IDk about the sexual side.
I think it depends on the relationship. Personally, I married the person, not her genitalia. I like those too but I want the person to be with me until the day we die, far far in the future.
I’m bi.
As a trans masculine non-binary person it’s more of personal conversation. My partner isn’t into masculine body types so my transition ended up being purely social because my partner does more on a daily basis to contribute to my happiness then the comfort of being in a body that doesn’t make me feel like shit daily. It’s a bit like having a pet allergy but deciding that you can live with feeling like someone poured sand into your sinuses every day rather than giving up your furry best friend. For all purposes though our relationship is coded and treated as though I am my specified gender. We are effectively culturally a same sex couple. Neither of us use female terms for my junk and he doesn’t claim to be straight. We do joke he is “queer by association” however.
But what I am doing counts as a full transition.
In regards to the what you give up situation it’s all rather dependant on how adverse you are and whether someone in your relationship is able to give a little and how much you value and ultimately how non-fungible the relationship is to you… Because - just putting it out there - strap-ons do exist.
Yeah they just aren’t what I want though. It’s not that I wouldn’t be supporting him, it’s that I don’t know how that part would go.
And that’s fine. I do what I do because I have a mentality of non-fungibility. There aren’t simply more fish in the sea, this is my person. There’s not another one out there for me.
There isn’t anything ethically wrong with someone with a more flexible approach to romance or someone who has a hard boundry. Not everyone is down for a sacrifice at that level for another person - and that is okay, not everyone is deserving of being the recipient of that kind of sacrifice just as everyone isn’t nessisarily capable of making that kind of sacrifice. If you are only kind of happy with your relationship then that’s not enough it has to be deep. It isn’t nessisarily easy, it doesn’t get easier and it might require daily conviction. It is a vulnerable space too. If you don’t have absolute trust it’s not going to work and absolute trust comes with intense emotional risk.
But on the other hand of things if your partner is dead set on doing this, you love them in a holistic way, you’re in a stable environment and you are at any level unsure of your ability to be attracted to them… you could probably afford to try. You might actually surprise yourself with be how you are okay then you thought you would be - and you can set the expectation at the beginning of the process that you are unsure of yourself and don’t know if it’s something you can do so they know and weigh the risks as part of their transition. Not all transitions are 100%. Trans people are often very calculated about what they choose to pursue based on what they personally value out of life in a more general sense. Not everyone goes for every option and the reasons behind them are intensely personal value judgements that involve way more than just the dysphoria/euphoria hits. I think way too many people peace out of things in general before they try or fully understand something and miss out because they built molehills into mountains. The process of transition isn’t lightning fast. You have time to think, to adjust, to compromise and if it really isn’t working for you then you will be absolutely sure that it’s not for you.
It all depends on your personal estimation of the value of the relationship you have going and how open you are to the process of self exploration to test your hypothesis about yourself against an actual real life situation. Because none of us know ourselves half so well as we think we do.
I’m not unwilling to try, that’s for sure.
Then, provided this is not simply a theoretical, I wish you whatever outcome is the best for everyone in the situation you are in. May you and your partner find the most happiness whatever that outcome looks like.
Oh haha he’s not doing that. It was just a hypothetical.
I mean…I Guess my wife would have to get used to getting banged in the ass.
So I guess if be to down for it?
If they’re going FtM, that would sadly be the end of the relationships. Can see ourselves being friends, though!
Yeah there’s one that I’ve wondered for a while now. Awhile back, I found out that women don’t have prostates but they can still feel pleasure from that hole. How can they feel pleasure from that hole if they don’t have a prostate?
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Women have skene glands which develop from the same cells as the male prostate.
There’s lots of nerves there. Gotta relax and it’s different but can be good. It’s definitely a collaborative effort.
Your G-spot and anterior fornix butt up against your rectum, so basically it’s like your G-spot in reverse.
Idk it just hurts for me though. A little touching the external parts is cool, but penetration is painful.
Not female, but my guess would be that since women have what is effectively the same as the head of a penis hidden inside, and the walls of the rectum are pretty thin, it’ll be getting knocked about a bit care if its close proximity. Some may enjoy this.
Yes.
Girl’s, how long have you been holding that fart?
After a few months of dating and holding them in, those farts and all future ones earn their freedom. My boyfriend now blames the cats when he smells something, which is very nice of him.
My now wife hid them from me for about 3 or 4 months. She’s more flatulent than me. Always to think about how hush hush it has to be before everything comes out. I farted in front of her within days of our first kiss.
How do I show interest in a pretty girl next to a girl who isn’t without making the not-pretty girl sad?
