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This has been solved they are both calzones. https://cuberule.com/
I find that system inconvenient, as it does not inform me of how I should eat any given item. Classification for the purpose of classification is insufficient. However, an alternative that allows me to prepare my ustensils based on the classification is useful, and therefore I propose…
Soup, salad, and sandwich are the three states of food, and they can go through phase transitions. They are closely accompanied by spoon, fork, and knife, respectively.
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A soup is any food that requires a spoon, and thus includes soups, drinks, cereal with milk, etc. Tipping a container is merely the use of the container as a large and unwieldy spoon, a straw is similarly a spoon when its topology is combined with suction.
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A salad then is anything bite sized that can be forked, and one’s hands are little more than fleshy forks, the fingers prehensile tines. Popcorn, salads, cut up steak bites, a handful of cheerios, etc.
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A sandwich is anything that requires it to be cut in order to be consumed, and one’s incisors are merely built-in knives. A sandwich is thus the vast majority of the cube rule’s content, and only because the cube rule focuses on the physical location of the starch. This is, of course, entirely irrelevant when it comes to the consumption of food.
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To observe a phase transition, one can cut up a sandwich without consuming it, thereby turning it into a salad; can drown a salad to turn it into a soup; can freeze a soup to turn it into a sandwich, etc.
Shredded cheese is a salad.
While I think your system allows for some really odd edge cases, I like the way you think.
This thread makes me angry.
I mostly agree with these broad level classifications, except for sandwich. A sandwich refers to the construction (something sandwiched between something else) and also the intended method of consumption (no utensils and rarely a napkin). By your classification a 32oz steak is a sandwich, yet it must be consumed quite differently than an ice cream sandwich.
I’d change the sandwich category to be the chunk category, and have sandwiches as a subcategory of chunks and salads where the food comes surrounded by edible material that’s easy to handle without utensils.
There’s also the group of very thin soups that might deserve it’s own group, but that might just be a qualitive difference.
Completely agree, and will definitely make that change. As soon as Panera Bread starts selling Chunks.
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I don’t understand how pumpkin pie is toast, but cheesecake is a quiche. Shouldn’t they be the same whichever they are?
It’s hard to tell whether the difference is that the pumpkin pie crust is “slanted” while the cheesecake crust is vertical, or that the pumpkin pie is a single slice while a “quiche”-topology cheesecake is intended to be eaten whole.
So if I understand right, the cube rule is giving permission to eat a whole cheesecake, but not a whole pumpkin pie?
I love that under this system the popular examples of type 4 ‘sushi’ includes no sushi, unlike type 1. That and in the process of eating something can cause it to change type.
the process of eating something can cause it to change type.
Process of eating and perspective.
Beef Wellington:
To the chef: Calzone
To the diner: SushiTell this to Ramsey and see how he reacts.
It’s a good system, we should adopt it for all foods
I don’t think I would go that far. From a topographical point of view type 1, type 3 and type 5 are identical.
Omg, not the donut argument again… 🤣
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According to Salad Theory all food is salad.
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Sane, rational, and consistent. I love it. At the same time: this is absolutely going to start fights.
I love this so much.
I like this statement because it’s successful on two levels. You can also argue over whether “pop-tart” counts as one word or two.
It is also a calzone.
It’s neither a calzone nor a ravioli. Pop tarts have pastry crusts. Calzones use a leavened crust, and ravioli have pasta crusts.
I’ve never boiled a pop tart
What? How do you brew your poptart tea then?
They’re scones.
Hmmm id say a canzone is a dumpling, because it’s folded over on itself.
Nah, it’s baked in an oven, it’s a pasty.
Hmm good point!
Actually, it’s a cheesey tomato soup in a bread bowl.
Def 2 words!
Blueberry is two words now apparently.
PopTart is a brand and is one word.
It’s the internet. People will argue with you even when you’re demonstrably right.
No they won’t!
Salsa is fruit salad.
Salsa is a spicy smoothie
Pico de gallo maybe
I’ve never had a fruit salad with the consistency of salsa, but I see where you’re coming from. They are very close relatives.
Nah, this is just objectively wrong. Even if you think of tomato as a fruit, what else is a fruit in typical salsa? Nothing.
Not a staple where I’m from, but aren’t there japalenos in there? Bell peppers ?
Awww shit. I dun fucked up. Apparently all peppers are fruits, botanically speaking.
“Vegetables” are not A Thing. The word just means a part of a plant we eat as a savoury dish. Some are seeds (like peas), or pods with the seeds still inside (green beans), or leaves (spinach, chard), roots or kinda-roots (carrots, garlic, beets), or (baby) flowers (cauliFLOWER, broccoli, Brussels sprouts - all from the same recent cabbage ancestor), lots are fruit (pumpkin, zucchini, cucumber, peppers, tomatoes). I found it fascinating when I planted my first garden 5 years ago, knowing squat about nature. Veggies are just plants where your pick the good part.
How are you defining a savoury? As a taste like sweet, salty, savoury, etc? Plenty of sweet (and salty, bitter and sour) dishes made with vegetables.
New York City?!
Not salad, salad is something you can “toss” in a jumble, like popcorn or some kinds of hash browns.
Salsa is generally more thoroughly mixed than that, so smoothie or maybe soup.
Hash browns are salad, confirmed.
Your kids are poorly behaved
Ramen is just anime spaghetti.
I’d argue the way that ramen noodles are made is different enough. Spaghetti is just flour, water, and salt whereas ramen noodles can have an alkaline process (kansui) among other things. Spaghetti is also one type of noodle whereas ramen is a category with a fair bit of variety.
Weebs aren’t people
I’d argue the way that weebs are made is different enough. People are just flour, water, and salt whereas weebs can have an alkaline process (kansui) among other things.
If you’re saying I’m a weeb, that’s actually a first. I do live in Japan but don’t give a shit about anima or manga and have plenty of criticisms about life here.
But that is true
Tool is overrated
I wanna downvote you so bad but it wouldn’t be right
Come at me
They said “start a fight”, not “speak basic truths”
Raviolo
I bring this up every time with someone who eats a panino for lunch!
Cereal is a soup
Vanilla soy bean latte is a three bean soup.
Except coffee is a fruit.
Beans are a fruit. Kinda. We mostly eat the seeds of the legume fruit. But we also use the seeds of vanilla orchids, coffee cherries, and soy beans. It’s not three bean soup it is bird food.
Ketchup is a smoothie
A hotdog is a sandwich?
Yeah, I put ice in my cereal. So what?
That makes no sense.
No. It’s a taco.
Hot pockets are strombolis.
The creator correctly says “jif”
It’s an acronym standing for graphic interchange format. Not that I care all that much tbh. Reminds me of parents naming their kid cVIIItlyn. Sure you can pronounce it whatever you want, doesn’t make you any less stupid. Also, iirc it was invented by a team, what do the rest of them say?
Only one guy is listed as the creator, Steve wilhite, who says “jif” is correct, famously and infamously making the pronouncement with a gif when he received his lifetime achievement award haha.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBtKxsuGvko
Apparently, a common joke around his office was “choosy developers choose gif”, a play on jif commercials.
He’s a troll and giggles every time this comes up. This makes him my hero.
Sure. Why not, lem
It’s an acronym standing for graphic interchange format.
That doesn’t affect how it’s pronounced.
LASER stands for Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation. If you were going to pronounce it based on how those words are pronounced it would be “Lahseer”.
The best reason to pronounce “gif” with a hard g is that the closest word we have is “gift” and that uses a hard g.
Just wanna say I didn’t downvote you.
I get your argument, maybe we SHOULD pronounce it lahseer, sounds cool.
Lahseer does sound cool, but I’m in favor of words being spelled as fonetikuhly as possible in English.
In order to do that, we have to clean up what each letter does first. The whole reason the gif fight started is because G and J overlap in sound values a lot. And don’t get me started on S, C, K, & Q.
And O.
But, still, there are letters that have fairly consistent pronunciations. Where possible we should try to stick with those.
I’ve given up on vowels. Mercedes, Echinacea, Manoeuvre, shield, beige, just throw them around until it looks right.
Isn’t there a video/gif asking if it’s pronounced “birthday jift”, “jolden retriever”, etc?
Gee, I’m sure there’s some genuinely genius gentleperson who registered their generous gif genuflections.
Pop tarts are wellingtons
Your lifestyle causes climate change.
Sadly disqualified, objective facts and reality have been deemed political.
Is a hotdog a sandwich?
I thought about this a lot recently after someone said it, ::: spoiler my opinion is that No, a hotdog is not a sandwich because it is meat inside of a single piece of bread. If you accidentally broke the bun into two pieces you could argue that you’ve made a hotdog sandwich because the meat is still called a hotdog and you’ve got two pieces of bread. That some sub sandwiches are a single nearly split piece of bread I view as an implementation detail moreso than a defining characteristic and not enough to say that sandwiches can be a single piece of bread. :::
It’s a taco.
That’s a type of sandwich
Like a hot dog or cuban
Bread is a requirement for something to be a sandwich, so you’ll have to convince me that a tortilla is bread. You might be able to make a case for the soft flour tortilla, but I just don’t see how hard corn tortillas can possibly fit under the umbrella of “bread”.
If naan is bread and corn bread is bread then naan corn bread is bread
If we assume toast is still bread then your hard corn tortillas are still bread
Are waffles bread? Doughnuts? Deepfry batter? Ricecakes? Mushrooms? Potatoes? Peppers, tomatoes, cucumbers, eggplants, apples? Cabbage? Egg? Cheese?
I’ve seen all of these used to make what can only be called sandwiches. Bread is certainly popular for it’s dry and durable structure, but it’s not a requirement.
Is Subway not a sandwich then if the bread isn’t split into two pieces?
Sub bread is often split. It’s just the type of roll used. I’d consider Hot Dogs a small sub or hoagie, just like a sausage, peppers and onions hoagie.
It’s a sub
Reminds me of “The Cube Rule”, which argues that a hot dog is a taco!
Sometimes if I only want a small sandwich I just use one slice of bread folded over itself. Is that not a sandwich then?
In my opinion, no. I’ve alerted the sandwich police.
That’s a sanga
Open face sandwich.
Hoagie, po’ boy, hero, grinder.
Lots of split bread or one bread sandwiches.
One could argue that bread slices are a loaf that was split/divided.
I’m calling a slice something that makes the bread into two pieces and a split something that opens it up while still being one piece.
The existence of “open faced” sandwiches makes your argument invalid.
Those are actually hot dogs
A ravioli is a sandwich.
A calzone.
Yeah, that’s what I said, a sandwich!😉
Pizza is an open faced sandwich.
Three words are absolutely sufficient:
You wanna fight?
Poptarts are ravioli
